Instruct,
Few people
seem to comprehend, that the primary function of language is to instruct.
However, there is a great difference between the instruction, which is given with
Disembodied Language (DL) and the instruction, which is given with Embodied
Language (EL). With the former, those who are instructed, will perform under a
sense of pressure, because they fear punishment, which results from not obeying
or doing as they are told, but with the latter, there is flawless performance,
as the instruction results in the behavior, which is beneficial to the
instructed as well as the instructor. With EL, the instructor and the instructed
are on the same page, but with DL, the instructor always dominates the
instructed and demands him or her, to follow his or her orders.
You may not view
it that way, but these words, like all words, were meant to instruct. Every
time we engage in language, we either understand others or others understand
us. However, this text makes it clear to you, that understanding only occurs in
EL. We are, unknowingly, but almost permanently, engaging in DL, in which we do
not and cannot understand each other, since we do not and cannot understand
ourselves with the forceful language, which disconnects us from our own experience.
As I was saying,
it makes an enormous difference whether we are instructed, by someone with DL
or EL. This difference is so gigantic, because someone who instructs with DL,
is boring, because they are on automatic pilot, whereas someone who instructs
with ongoing EL, is engaging, connecting, interesting and stimulating, because
he or she is enlightened. If someone gives the right instruction, which results
in the increase of the right behavior, this always results in a sense of euphoria,
victory and success, which I call Language Enlightenment (LE). Only someone,
who him or herself has mastered some skill, is able to determine, if someone
else has mastered it. And, then, there are two masters, who with their EL can share
LE with each other. It is tremendously joyful.
I am
enlightened and, yes, I use my language very differently than you. Of course,
this text is aimed at those, who don’t know EL, who are unconsciously stuck in their
own DL. To me, there is no language, which randomly overtakes me, as I am in
charge of it, always. I am not a control-freak, to the contrary, I let things
happen and I enjoy what my LE is telling me with my EL. I am bi-lingual and my
words may sometimes change from English to Dutch or from Dutch to English, but
I don’t know the language of basketball, politics, physics or religion. I know
my own EL, which is the language that creates space.
While these
words have an instructional effect, this effect is not something, which I
expect. If they result in your exploration of the difference between your DL
and your EL, it would be wonderful, but it is not because I expect you to do
that. As a matter of fact, due to my ongoing EL, my LE has taught me, to not
expect anything from anyone, not even myself. I instruct only myself and you can,
in principle, also instruct yourself with EL, instead of with DL. Surely,
because others have instructed you with DL, you are used to instructing
yourself with DL as well. This is why you are not happy or successful, as DL
means, you are beating yourself up and forcing yourself, to do all kind of
things, you don’t want to do, if you would listen to what you say to yourself
with EL.
I feel no
urge to change my EL, as I am very happy and satisfied with it. Unlike your
involvement with DL, I don’t fantasize
or fabricate phony constructs. To me, language is like furniture, which makes
my life comfortable. I don’t imagine, that I have inner language, as I know,
such a belief is the inevitable outcome of our involvement in DL. By now, my DL
has practically been reduced to nothing, as I have EL almost all the time. This
certainly wasn’t always the case, but I have made it so. Consequently, I feel very
proud, that I am able to instruct myself in this way.
As you can
tell, for me language is something active, which I do, consciously, joyfully, effectively
and consistently. For anyone with EL, speech is conduct and, yes, how we talk
sets the stage for how we deal with our language, as well as our other
behaviors, but in DL, we get it all wrong, if we make it seem, as if there is a
difference between our language and our conduct. Moreover, of course, our language
is conduct, as it is always – relationally – targeted at individuals, who can understand
us. We have never acknowledged the difference between DL and EL, but once we get
a sense of what EL is, we realize EL is action, but DL has psychologically
paralyzed us, as it has prevented us from acting. With DL, is seems as if
language happens passively, thus it appears as if your so-called mind has a
life of its own. I don’t have a mind, as my EL occurs only where I speak it,
when I hear it, where I write it and when I read it.
My EL is in
the here and now, but your DL is all over the place and, therefore, it prevents
you from being where you are. How can you be who you are, if your language
doesn’t allow you to be where you are and you do not embody your language? Of
course, you don’t know who you are, as you constantly act out of fear. You fear
to fail the demanding instructions of your own DL, which generalizes to every
aspect of your life. You fear to be alone with yourself, you fear to lose your
job, you fear you are not loved, you fear you will die one day. Your fear ruins
everything, as it makes life into a meaningless and dreadful struggle.
You have
tried to instruct yourself, to overcome your fear and other problems, but the
fact is, none of your self-instructions work, as long as you engage in DL. There
were also a few self-instructions, which have worked, because you came to your
senses, you calmed down and you were able to have some EL, albeit, unknowingly.
Yes, you had some moments of EL, but you never had EL skillfully, deliberately
and consistently and this is why every form of self-help is always
self-defeating. The only thing you are good at, with your inconsiderate,
insensitive, impatient DL, is pretend you are not afraid, pretend you don’t
have any problem, pretend you are strong, pretend you are certain and pretend you
know who you are, while in reality, you are consumed by fear, anxiety, stress,
worry, jealousy and frustration. DL keeps you running and your language literally
drives you mad.
Whether you
believe it or not, your DL results into your depression, your confusion, your
distraction, your inferiority complex, your chaos, your conflict, your eternal
victimhood and your exhaustion. You have no awareness, no attention, no energy
for how you use your language and you create your own living hell. When you
read these words, there is only one thing you can do: understand them and admit
it is true. Take your life into your own hands, by paying attention to how your
DL determines what you do or don’t do. Your life, is how you instruct yourself.
When you
engage in EL, instead of DL, you realize that EL isn’t a choice, but a possibility,
which was created by you, after you had stopped your DL. The issue of choice is
completely misunderstood in DL, as it always seems, as if you choose, but in
EL, you find, there is no you – inside of you – who behaves, therefore, there
is also no you, who chooses. Stated differently, in EL there is only
possibility or potential, which I call LE. Your possibilities with your language
are endless, if you listen to the sound of your voice while you speak. It is
amazing what you are able to come up with, when EL flows freely and naturally.
I instruct
you, to stop instructing yourself with your DL, so you can begin to instruct
yourself with your EL instead, because your EL is the expression of your LE,
which is your wellbeing. This hasn’t happened, not because it couldn’t happen,
but because you didn’t know it could happen. Your ignorance about language, is
a matter of being stuck with worthless concepts, which prevent you from exploring
what your language means to you. As long as you remain afraid, you don’t
explore, who you are without fear.
Telling
yourself to not be afraid has never worked, but letting yourself know, why you
feel afraid, is the first step into making your self-exploration with your own EL
possible. The moment, you, accurately, in your own way, in your own words, calmly
describe to yourself why language works against instead of for you and why you fear
your own authority, your fear will disappear. You hear it in the sound of your
voice, you can’t miss it, as in that precious moment everything changes by
itself, as your EL immediately reveals what you have always been, but what you
couldn’t be before, with your DL. With EL, you find, that your language fits
with your experience and this match is truly the gift that keeps on giving.
With ongoing EL, you instruct yourself into your own freedom. Now you can put an end to the fear, which has undermined your life, by preventing you from doing what you could do and had wanted to do. Also, in the absence of this fear, you will be able to stop what you did, but didn’t want to do, but you did it, as you were conditioned to do it. There will be a selective reorganization of your behavioral repertoire, because of your EL, due to which only what works remains.
My life
is happy, satisfying and uncomplicated, but it can only be this way, because of how
I deal with my language. This is not because I am exceptionally smart, skillful or
creative, but because I don’t fear my own language anymore. I say it, I listen
to it, I write it, I read it and I instruct myself to achieve what I am capable
of achieving. I hear it is true and I experience the positive consequences of
my own behavior right away as well as later on.