Know2,

 

It is something wonderful to know and experience that my knowledge continues to increase and renew itself. Why can I know what it means to be myself and why have you forgotten that? Of course you can certainly know what you have obviously forgotten because of your language. If you only listened to yourself, because you finally spoke to yourself, then you could hear, who you are and have always been.

 

The disappearance of your words is like dying, but also like coming back to life or being reborn. Every spoken and written word is a release of a stuck text, which was rusted, because you have never written or said before, who you really are. You are and you were not yourself, because of your language, which was not true. The truth of what you say or write is not like your fake awareness, which could never mean that you could really be yourself.

 

Consciousness is the language that you have spoken and written with total self-confidence, because you can hear and read it. And, yes, sometimes it is more important to write about yourself, than to speak about yourself, because reading has a different effect on you than hearing. Your so-called intelligence is your handling of your language, which is very different in writing than in speaking.

 

While you write you are silent and the words flow effortlessly from your pen, instead of from your mouth. They appear before you and you watch them come into being, through your voluntary movement. When you talk, however, you produce a voice, that you experience as the sound that fits in your body, as a resonant space, like a violin or a cello.

 

Your voice is yours and that is why you speak your language and not in a distracting energy, which deprives you of your experience. You like to listen to your own sound, because producing that sound feels good, because it makes you know what you want to know. One is ignorant, because one does not want to know what one already knows, but you know what you want to know and wanting to know ensures, that you no longer forget what you know.

 

Is it strange that it is never possible, to give in to not wanting to know and that we always seem to remain saddled with involuntary knowing? Your writing to you and your speaking to you, tells you why this was the case for a long time. What you said or wrote was not yet your own. Because you said or wrote it for others, you did not know what you could and would want to know for yourself, if you used your language in the way that only you can. Appropriating your own language is knowing yourself, but refusing or denying your language, for the sake of others, is your biggest problem.

 

Of course you can listen to yourself and speak with and for yourself and you can also write what you want to read and what you want to know and that is mastery of your language. You are the boss of your language and language will never get away from you again, because it is yours, just as your hand that holds the writing pen is yours, and just as the sound of your voice is yours. This penetration into your own language is a solemn entry into your domain, in which you can be completely yourself, because your language can finally happen. By taking the time, you give yourself permission to hear it and to read it.

 

How could you ever detect your own language, if you had not yet heard or read it? Now it is possible, because you said it and wrote it. The knowledge that makes itself known, is like sitting comfortably in a chair, you purchased because you liked that chair so much. When you bought that chair, you already knew, your pleasant future was guaranteed. Even then, you took the time to feel what it was and would be like, to stay in the position that chair allowed you to have. You could already sit and wait then, because you had already sat on so many other chairs - during the musical chairs - and therefore you could know that this chair would help you find and remain true to your own language.

 

Your language surrounds your body, 

but it is never inside you and when

 you use your language in this 

way, it is like being massaged, 

while you know that you have 

learned something new. 

Expressing your language 

is therefore not bringing your

 language out from within, 

but always remaining outside. 

Your language is really only 

ever outside of yourself and 

being outside yourself, with

 your language, is the essence

 of being yourself. In other 

words, your language is free, 

it is no longer locked up in 

the fantasy you called 

thinking. Your language

 can finally go where it 

naturally goes, because 

you let it. You no longer

 stand in the way of your

 language by believing 

or claiming that it was

 you, who did it.

 

Although you learned your language from others and you speak the same language with them, your own language is not caused by others, but also not by anything within you, so-called thinking, inner self, your mind, your ego or your feelings. Just like breathing, your language happens naturally. This knowing is natural and is adapted to the tangible and observable reality revealed by your language.

 

You know that new things are constantly being known and your old knowledge will be forgotten without any hesitation. There is no fear in your knowing, because it is always new and the old clinging to what you knew has been erased by your words. You are amazed and intrigued what you say and write, because it is true and it is your surrender to all the words, that you have always possessed, but that you have not used in this way before.

 

Your flow of language is oceanic, it encompasses everything. It is airy, spacious and continuous, because there is no longer any restraint, because language has made the other person one with you. You are one with the other, since your language has unlimited reach, reducing time to a surreal painting. There is no time, but eternity, in which you, in the flesh, may and can say or write what is going on.

 

What a great gift, what an enormous joy and what a deep gratitude that everything could fall into place through your language. Now that you know that you no longer have to keep this knowledge, because it will not expire, you do not have to save it and you can give it away freely, because you can live a little longer. People say, life is short, but you have no need for eternal life, because it has been given to you, to truly experience your own language. Others will continue with what they have determined to be their language, when you are gone and you know that their progress, just like your experience, will mean to them, the importance of their knowledge.

 

Writing and breathing the breath, which knowledge has spoken and heard, you go on as long as you can. Today is a day, that provided the language, in the evening, in which you could dissolve, before going to sleep. Nothing to do, but close your eyes and feel the warm blankets that cover you, until the morning when you open your eyes again. Then you will come out from under your covers and leave your bed again, to go where the day will take you. Your made bed is knowledge and when the evening comes, you  return to the place of your peace and rest.

 

Weten2,

 

Ik noem dit schrijven, weten2, omdat ik al eerder over weten had geschreven en er kennenlijk nog meer over wilde vertellen. Als je wilt weten, wat ik schreef in weten1, type dan het woord weten in het hokje links boven aan de blog, en dan kun je mijn eerdere schrijven van Vrijdag, 17 Februarie, 2023 lezen en vergelijken, met wat ik er gisteren avond over schreef. Ik heb het zelf net nagelezen en ik raad iedereen aan, om eerst weten1 te lezen, omdat het een puntgave inleiding is voor mijn schrijven van nu. Het iets geweldigs, om te weten en te ervaren, dat mijn weten alsmaar toeneemt en zich vernieuwd.

 

 

Waarom kan ik weten, wat het betekent, om mezelf te zijn en waarom ben jij dat vergeten? Natuurlijk kan jij wel degelijk weten, wat jij uiteraard vanwege je taal bent vergeten. Als je maar eens naar jezelf luisterde, omdat je eindelijk eens met jezelf sprak, dan kon je horen, wie je bent en altijd bent geweest.

 

Het verdwijnen van je woorden is als een doodgaan, maar eveneens een opnieuw tot leven komen. Elk gesproken en geschreven woord, is een loslaten van een vastgeplakte tekst, die zat vastgeroest, omdat jij nog nooit eerder schreef of zei, wie jij nou eigenlijk echt bent. Jij bent en je was niet jezelf, vanwege je taal, die niet waar was. Het waar zijn van wat je zegt of schrijft, is niet zoals jou nep gewaarzijn, dat nooit tot gevolg kon hebben, dat jij echt jezelf kon zijn.   

 

Bewustzijn is de taal, die jij met zelfverzekerheid hebt gezegd en geschreven, omdat jij die kunt horen en lezen. En, soms is het belangrijker, om over jezelf te schrijven, dan over jezelf te spreken, omdat het lezen nou eenmaal een ander effect op je heeft dan het horen. Je zogenaamde intelligentie, is je omgang met taal, die schrijvend heel anders is, als sprekend.

 

Terwijl je schrijft ben je stil en vloeien de woorden moeiteloos uit je pen, in plaats van uit je mond. Ze verschijnen voor je en je kijkt ernaar, hoe ze tot stand komen, door jou vrijwillige beweging. In het praten produceer jij het geluid, dat jij ervaart als de klank, die in jou lichaam past, als resonante ruimte.

 

Jou stem is van jou en daarom spreek jij jou taal en niet in een energie, die jou ervaring tekort doet. Jij luistert graag naar je eigen klank, want het produceren van dat geluid voelt goed, omdat het maakt, dat jij aan de weet komt, wat jij wil weten. Men is onwetend, omdat men niet wil weten wat men al weet, maar jij weet wat jij wilt weten en het willen weten zorgt, dat je niet meer vergeet wat je weet.  

 

Merkwaardig, dat er nooit kan worden toegegeven, aan het niet willen weten en dat we altijd schijnbaar moeten blijven opgezadeld met onvrijwillig weten? Jou schrijven en jou spreken vertellen je waarom dit lange tijd zo was. Wat je zei of schreef, was nog niet van jezelf. Omdat je het zei of schreef voor anderen, wist je niet, wat jij voor jezelf zou kunnen en willen weten, als jij jou taal zou hanteren, op de manier zoals alleen jij dat kan. Het toe-eigenen van jou taal, is jou weten en weigeren en ontkennen van jou taal, omwille van anderen, is jou allergrootste probleem.

 

Natuurlijk kan jij naar jezelf luisteren en voor jezelf spreken en kan ook jij schrijven, wat jij wil lezen en wil weten en dat is jou meesterschap. Jij bent de baas over jou taal en taal gaat nooit meer met je aan de haal, want het is van jou, zoals ook jou hand, die de schrijf-pen vasthoudt van jou is, en zoals de klank van jou stem van jou is. Dit doordringen in je taal, is een plechtig binnengaan in je eigen domein, waarin jij volledig jezelf kan zijn, omdat jou taal kan gebeuren. Doordat jij er de tijd voor neemt, geef jij jezelf toestemming, om het te horen en te lezen.

 

Hoe kon jij nou ooit je eigen taal ontwaren, indien je het nog niet hoorde of las? Nu is het mogelijk, want jij hebt het gezegd en geschreven. Het weten dat zich kenbaar maakt, is een comfortabel zitten in een stoel, die jij hebt aangeschaft, omdat jij die stoel zo lekker vond zitten. Toen jij die stoel kocht, wist je al dat jou aangename toekomst was gegarandeerd. Ook toen al, nam jij de tijd, om te voelen, hoe het was en zou gaan zijn, om te verblijven in de houding die die stoel jou liet hebben. Jij kon toen al zitten en wachten, omdat je al op andere stoelen had gezeten – tijdens de stoelen-dans – en daarom kon je weten, dat deze stoel, jou zou helpen om jou taal te vinden.

 

Jou taal omsluit jou lichaam, maar is nooit binnenin je en wanneer je op die manier je taal hanteert, dan is het alsof je wordt gemasseerd, terwijl je weet dat je iets nieuws hebt geleerd. Het uiten van je taal is dus niet het van binnen naar buiten brengen van je taal, maar het altijd buiten blijven. Jou taal is echt altijd alleen maar buiten jezelf en het buiten jezelf zijn, met je taal, is het jezelf zijn. Anders gezegd, je taal is vrij, het is niet meer opgesloten in de fantasie die jij het denken noemde. Je taal kan eindelijk gaan waar het vanzelf naartoe gaat, als jij het toelaat. Jij staat jou taal niet meer in de weg, door te geloven of te beweren, dat jij het was, die het had gedaan.

 

Ofschoon jij jou taal van anderen hebt geleerd en met hen dezelfde taal spreekt, is jou eigen taal niet door anderen veroorzaakt, maar ook niet door iets binnenin jezelf, je zogenaamde denken, je innerlijke zelf, je mind, je ego of je gevoel. Net zoals ademen, gebeurd jou taal vanzelf. Dit weten is natuurlijk en is aangepast aan de tastbare en waarneembare werkelijkheid, die door jou taal wordt geopenbaard.

 

Je weet dat er voortdurend nieuwe dingen worden geweten en het oude weten kan en mag daarom zonder enige schroom worden vergeten. Er is geen enkele angst in je weten, omdat het altijd nieuw is en het oude vasthouden aan wat je wist, is met jou woorden uitgewist. Je staat versteld en verwonderd over wat je zegt of schrijft, omdat het waar is en je overgave is aan alle woorden, die jij altijd al bezat, maar die je nog niet eerder op deze manier gebruikte.

 

Het stromen van jou taal is oceanisch, want jou taal omvat alles. Het is luchtig, ruimtelijk en doorgaand, omdat er geen terughoudendheid meer is, want taal heeft die ander een gemaakt met jou. Jij bent een met die ander. Jou taal heeft onbeperkt bereik, die de tijd tot een surrealistisch schilderij reduceert. Er is geen tijd, maar eeuwigheid, waarin jij, in levende lijve, mag en kan zeggen of schrijven hoe het zit.

 

Wat een groot geschenk, wat een enorme vreugde en wat een diepe dankbaarheid, dat alles door jou taal op z’n plaats kon komen te zitten. Nu jij weet, dat jij dit weten niet meer hoeft te bewaren, omdat het niet zal verjaren, hoef je het niet op te sparen en kan je het vrijelijk weggeven, omdat je nog even wat langer mag leven. Men zegt, dat het leven maar kort is, maar met jou taal, heb jij geen behoefte aan een eeuwig leven, want het is jou gegeven, om jou eigen taal te beleven. Anderen zullen te zijner tijd verder gaan met hun taal, als jij er niet meer bent en jij weet, dat hun voortgang, net als jou beleving, voor hen het belang van hun weten zal betekenen.

 

Terwijl je schrijft en de adem ademt, die het weten heeft gezegd en gehoord, ga je voort, zo lang je kan. Vandaag is het een dag, die in de avond de taal gaf, waarin jij mocht zijn, wie je kon zijn, voor het slapen gaan. Niets anders te doen, dan je ogen te sluiten en de warme dekens te voelen, die jou toedekken, tot de ochtend, waarin jij je ogen weer open doet. Dan kom jij weer onder je dekens uit en zul je weer je bed verlaten, om te gaan naar waar de dag je zal brengen. Het opgemaakte bed is je weten en als het weer avond is, keer je terug naar je vrede en je rust.          

 

Religion,

 

Those who have the courage, to explore the great difference between Disembodied Language (DL) and Embodied Language (EL), will have to admit, that all of religion is complete nonsense. It is because of our unconscious involvement in DL, that we keep giving a free pass to religion, which has created – which continuous to create – gigantic problems for human beings. People talk about climate change, injustice or the need for diversity, equity and inclusion, but nobody objects to the stupidity and human tragedy, which is maintained by our belief in a higher power.

 

The future of mankind is not in religion, but in the sense of individuality, which will forever abandon prayer, as the hallucination of talking with unseen others. EL is the language of individualism, but DL is based on our fear of social retaliation, that is, we behave as we do, because others, in one way or another, force us to behave a certain way. DL is group-behavior, which makes it seem, as if there is no need for EL. DL has always judged, ridiculed, disrespected and rejected any attempt at EL and mankind is where it is today, because, to my knowledge, only two people - me and my dear Dutch friend AnnaMieke - have investigated and experienced, what it is like to continue with EL.  

 

Astonishingly, only two people, in the whole wide world, are able to speak and write about their Language Enlightenment (LE), because they possess the skill, that is necessary to continue with EL, but this skill has nothing to do with religion. In fact, all religion has made us literally believe, everything will be okay without this skill, and this is precisely, why we are ignorant about our EL and, inadvertently, engage in superstitious, grandiose, ineffective DL. As I was talking with someone this morning, I received the common feed-back, anyone who criticizes religion is bound to get. Supposedly, we have to be respectful of a person’s religion. Of course, it makes no sense to get ourselves in trouble, by opposing those, by exposing those or by arguing with those, who believe in a none-existent deity, which, supposedly, is more important than their own existence. While the person was willing to talk with me, he accused me of being negative towards people with religion.

 

Anyone who, like me, has become aware – with his or her EL – about his or her LE, anyone whose own language has revealed his or her own true nature, will have, what can perhaps best be described as positive negativity. Of course, I describe it this way, so that the reader, who unknowingly engages in DL, begins to understand, I am against all religion, as I am in favor of EL. I am not against DL, however, but I am against the products of DL, which can only be prevented if our DL is stopped. Being against DL has prevented us from becoming conscious about how we interact with each other. I cannot stop your DL, since you must do this yourself and you will never be able to experience the positive outcomes of your EL, if you refuse to acknowledge and then stop your own DL. Religion basically gives you another excuse, to go on with your unintelligent, dull, coercive DL.

 

Obviously, the imaginary conversation with some non-existent deity has always distracted people from having EL with each other, but if we look at religion more closely, there is no denying, it wasn’t this so-called higher power, which prevented us from EL, but other people. Actually, anyone who really goes into exploring, what it is like to have continuous EL, cannot avoid the realization, that it isn’t others, who were preventing us from EL, but it is we, ourselves. In other words, it is our identity or who we believe ourselves to be, which prevents us from having EL and once we have ongoing EL, our belief in who we believed to be dissolves. Therefore, our false belief in a mystical higher power – like our belief in a fabricated, behavior-causing, inner self or a mind – evaporates the moment we begin to value talking with ourselves, as more important than talking with others. Stated differently, others always are the so-called identity-priests, who both instill as well as reinforce our belief in who we appear to be.

 

Who we are is not a religion. It is only in absence of our EL, that we conjure constructs about ourselves, which are absolutely wrong. We are in denial of our mortality and still imagine, that we have an eternal soul, which lives on, after death or which is reborn in a different form. All of this is merely to maintain the notion of some sort of immortality. Surely, it is with DL, that we remain fearful of death and hang on to these superstitions. Presumably, the test of religion is its effect on conduct, but this is putting the horse behind the wagon. Once we focus on our conduct, on how we deal with our language, we discover that religion, as well as, an inner self or a mind, are constructs, which came about because we were forced to have DL and were never able to discover, acknowledge, explore and enjoy our EL, which reveals our LE.

 

 

Match,

 

When you discover – for yourself – the difference between your Disembodied Language (DL) and your Embodied Language (EL), you are faced with a great challenge. Although it is instantly clear to you, that you prefer your EL over your DL, your history of conditioning with DL can only be dismantled, to the extent, that you will be able to continue your EL. In order to continue your EL, you will have to stop your DL and to be able to accomplish this, you have to be upfront with yourself about behaviors, which are a match with your DL and those behaviors that match with your EL. Unless you correctly instruct yourself, to let go of those self-defeating behaviors, which were created and maintained by your DL, you will not be able to continue your EL and the whole behavioral repertoire, which matches with your EL.

 

Once you have admitted – to yourself – the great difference between your negative DL and your positive EL, you know very well, it is not up to you, to arrange a match between your own problematic behavior and your DL or between your liberating behavior and your EL. You either accept it, as it is, or you reject it. Most likely, you will do the latter. Due to your history of conditioning with DL, you will inevitably pretend, defend, believe and assert, all kinds of total nonsense, but the troubling reality of the rigid match between your supposedly normal behavior and your DL cannot be avoided. However, when you consider the match between your EL and the behaviors, which belong to it, you can’t help but feel uncertain, overwhelmed and confused, as you have never consciously paid attention, to those behaviors, which you absolutely need to be happy.

 

The only way in which you are going to be able, to match your EL with the behaviors, which fit with the language of your individuality, is if you surrender to the unfolding of your own EL, but this isn’t anything you have ever experienced before with your DL. As a matter of fact, you can only have EL, when your DL is completely stopped – as often as it takes – by you. Sometimes you may succeed, but often times you just can’t seem to do it, since you don’t know why you continue with your DL, as you haven’t talked enough about it with yourself. It makes no sense simply guessing, which behaviors fit with your EL and trying to have EL doesn’t work either.

 

During EL it is self-evident, what you should do or shouldn’t do, to have it. Obviously, you shouldn’t have DL and as you begin to hear and listen to your own self-instructions with your EL, you will actually begin to do all the things you have said to yourself, you would do. You will be so amazed and delighted, that you can follow through and that you achieve many positive consequences, which you have never experienced before. Although there will, of course, be setbacks, as you keep falling back into your habit of having DL again, this is necessary, because it makes you aware about the behaviors which match with your DL and the behaviors which match with your EL. You will be surprised about the behaviors which match with your EL, because they steer you into your aloneness, independence and freedom.

 

You will, in due course, discover this by yourself, your EL is not about your stress, anxiety, sadness, jealousy, frustration, fear, anger, confusion or lies, but about your wellbeing, relaxation, understanding, truth and happiness. All your dreadful, problematic, arrogant, automatic, insensitive, unnatural, dumb, superficial, meaningless behavior is a match with your stubborn DL. Neither I nor you made it so, this is a fact of life, which with EL you finally accept, say and hear. Moreover, you like to hear your EL, but of course, you don’t like to hear your DL and that is why you continue your EL and stop your DL. Why would you continue with DL, if it keeps so many of your ineffective troublesome behaviors going, which you no longer want to be involved in?

 

There is no way around it, when you begin to listen to your voice while you speak, you either notice the match or the mismatch between your language and your behavior. The former is your EL, the latter is your DL. Stated differently, you like and enjoy how you behave in EL, but you dislike and dread it, when you engage in DL. You never noticed this before, as you didn’t do the experiment, in which you listen to yourself while you speak and determine for yourself what is DL and EL. Look up cymatics, the science which investigates how sound waves create patterns in matter. Your voice is your sound, which creates all the behavioral patterns of your life. After you have stopped your DL and can continue with your EL, because you truly enjoy what you hear and when you allow yourself, to do what you like, you will experience your Language Enlightenment (LE).

 

The behaviors, which match and, therefore, support your EL and reveal your LE, have never occurred, because they are always new. In other words, your speaking voice is a vibration, which creates new behavioral patterns. However, this only occurs, if you speak with yourself and if you keep listening to how you sound and say what you say, so that you remain attuned to the frequency, which renews you.  EL is a match made in heaven, because you live in extasy, due to your sound and your behavior. At a practical level, you tell yourself what it is like to be enlightened and how to behave like an enlightened human being. You predict what you say and do, as you now listen to the previously missing frequency. You were conditioned to listen to others and, thus, you have never continuously listened to yourself.

 

Although you did not know this, DL is no match for you. With DL, you are not listening to the sound of your own wellbeing and as a result of that, you speak with a voice, which isn’t yours. Yes, you will speak with a different voice in EL and that voice is the sound of your LE. Everything will fall into place and there is no longer any need for you to match, because you are experiencing the flow of your EL. While all of this is beautiful and fascinating, you will only meet your match with someone, who, like you, has ongoing EL. Sadly, except myself and my dear Dutch friend AnnaMieke, there isn’t anyone else around, who knows about EL and LE. So, this means - although you can talk with us and have a lot of fun with us - you will need to come to terms with your aloneness or your own death, as everything dissolves in your EL. Ultimately, EL matches with your LE, which, in turn, matches with your nothingness.                  

 

You can hear me talk, sing and play my ukulele and recorder on my You Tube channel. Just type in my name Maximus Peperkamp and you will find me. 

 

Here is another beautiful text – I translated it for you from Dutch to English – from my dear friend AnnaMieke, with whom I speak every week with Embodied Language (ELT) about our Language Enlightenment (LE)... please, also check out her beautiful blog, where she writes fantastically about all her discoveries with EL.

 

https://klompanna2.blogspot.com/

 

Naturalness.

 

The resilience it can have, because of the logical consequence that the enlightenment has come to my parts, which I have been looking for for a long time. Unnoticed from all the writing, something has arisen, which has come to resemble an enlightenment and can now also experience that the decisiveness it had has flowed through to the wide ocean, where the drops have started to divide into more, in which I myself also stood. Where the brilliance that I could feel has now been confirmed in the action it has, in the breadth of discovering that I share my enlightenment. And I want to investigate which plane of encounter was still missing. And the little man on my shoulder who often passed judgment on not daring to speak about the enlightenment that I possess. Unknowingly, I have always known that my specialness in speaking and writing has shaped me into who I am and will be called, just as I know my name, like the dikes have been reinforced, like the wall has now fallen, in which I see a width that in its natural origin has placed me in the future of the present. I no longer wonder whether that is the intention, but simply my language points in that direction can indicate to unfold as it comes. Daring to be natural and being able to listen to one's own sound, where the core of an enlightenment can unfold, without an opposing voice. Without judging myself, but it is decisive in everything ordinary, which ultimately remains very special. Unnoticed as in a vision, the work that I show is flooded with my own writing as intended. I no longer wonder in the possibility of writing whether what I am doing is right, but let me go with the surrender that I feel I surrender to what can arise, which has remained my drive unnoticed, because I can now understand myself. Not only my words want to go to the light, but also all my parts on my blog. Awakening to who I really am to dare to be, which is known as enlightenment in being able to notice what it is like to be truly enlightened.

That is where my words fall short, where experiencing becomes more important, where the energy becomes so different in describing my language. Where the emotion has come closer, in the tears that can overwhelmingly tell me that this is the enlightenment in which I stand. Daring to stand by my own naturalness, to experience who I am, which has arisen in my writing.

Natuurlijkheid.

Hier is nog weer een prachtige tekst van mijn dierbare vriendin AnnaMieke, waarmee ik iedere week,  met Belichaamde Taal (BT) over onze Taal Verlichting (TV) spreek... lees ook maar eens haar blog waarop zij fantastisch schrijft over al haar ontdekkingen. 

https://klompanna2.blogspot.com/

 

Natuurlijkheid.

De veerkracht die het kan hebben, door het logisch gevolg, dat in mijn delen de verlichting is gekomen, waar ik al een hele tijd naar zocht .
Ongemerkt vanuit het vele schrijven is er iets ontstaan, wat op een verlichting is gaan lijken en nu ook kan ervaren, dat de daadkracht die het had, is door gegleden naar de wijde oceaan,waar de druppels tot meer is gaan verdelen, waarin ikzelf ook stond.Waar de schittering die ik kon voelen nu is bevestigd in de handeling die het heeft,in de wijdte van het ontdekken dat ik mijn verlichting deel.En wil gaan onderzoeken welk een vlak van ontmoetten er nog ontbrak.En het mannetje op mijn schouder die vaak een oordeel gaf, om niet te durven spreken over de verlichting die ik bezit.Ongemerkt heb ik eigenlijk altijd al geweten dat mijn bijzonderheid in het spreken en schrijven mij heeft gevormd in wie ik ben en zal heten zoals ik mijn naam ook ken,zoals de dijken zijn verstevigd,zoals de muur nu omgevallen is,waarin ik zie een wijdte die in haar natuurlijk oorsprongelijkheid mij neer heeft gezet in de toekomst van het heden Mij niet meer af vraag of dat de bedoeling is ,maar gewoon mijn taal die richting aan kan geven om te ontvouwen zoals het komt.
Het natuurlijk durven zijn en kunnen luisteren naar eigen klank,daar waar de kern van een verlichting kan ontvouwen,zonder een tegengeluid.Zonder een oordeel naar mijzelf ,maar de doorslag krijgt in al het gewone, wat uiteindelijk heel bijzonder blijft.
Ongemerkt als in een visie, is mijn werk die ik laat zien, overspoeld met eigen schrijven zoals bedoeld.Ik vraag mij niet meer af in de mogelijkheid van schrijven of het goed is wat ik doe,maar laat mij meegaan in de overgave die ik voel.Ik geef mij over aan wat er kan ontstaan,wat ongemerkt mijn drive is gebleven, omdat ik mijzelf nu kan verstaan.Niet alleen mijn woorden naar het licht willen gaan,maar ook al mijn delen op mijn blog.Het ontwaken in wie ik werkelijk durf te zijn,dat een verlichting weet te noemen in het opgemerkt kunnen beleven hoe het is om echt verlicht te kunnen zijn.
Daar schieten mijn woorden in tekort,waarin het ervaren belangrijker wordt,waar de energie zo anders wordt in het beschrijven van mijn taal.Waar de ontroering dichterbij is gaan staan,in de tranen die mij overweldigend kunnen vertellen, dat dit de verlichting is waarin ik sta.Bij mijn eigen natuurlijkheid durven te staan,te ervaren in  wie ik ben, zo in mijn schrijven is ontstaan.