Now,

 

Famous people – like Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra, Satguru, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Osho, Ramanana Maharshi, Gautama Buddha, Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, B.K.S. Iyengar, Thich Nhat Hahn, Alan Watts, Mahatma Gandhi, Lao Tzu, Joel Osteen, Henry David Thoreau, Mother Teresa, Wayne Dyer, Ophra Winfrey, Paramahansa Yogananda, Jim Carrey, Byron Katie – often feel the urge, to make a big deal about being in the here and now. They are with many more, than thirteen in a dozen. I’ve lost counting. Interestingly, none of them have ever spoken about the great difference between Disembodied Language (DL) and Embodied Language (EL). Anyone who talks about being in the here and now without mentioning, that we must first stop our DL, so that we can have EL, doesn’t know what he or she is talking about.

 

All so-called wisdom, mankind has accumulated in books, laws, videos, podcasts, courses, blogs, seminars, stories, songs, poems or other works of art, hasn’t led to acknowledgement of the DL/EL distinction. Consequently, our highly problematic DL, in which we, as speakers, don’t listen to ourselves, has continued unabated. Day by day, it becomes more painfully obvious, when it comes to talking, listening, interacting, communicating, we are hopelessly stuck. Our problems aren’t addressed, let alone solved. We live on a ticking time-bomb. Any moment, we may explode again. Yes, there’s nothing new going on, as our usual way of talking has always escalated in another outburst of war and chaos.

 

Anyone can have access to this writing. Anyone can have access to me and talk with me about the difference between DL and EL, but nobody seems to want to admit, that what I say is true. I have done what it takes, to be able to continue with my EL and that is why I can express my Language Enlightenment (LE). Only someone, like me, is able to speak and write, coherently, about the devastating DL, that everyone is unconsciously busy with, no matter how diverse, inclusive, equitable, spiritual, meditative or mindful, they believe or claim to be. We keep being busy with meaningless nonsense, because we can’t talk.

 

I tremendously enjoy myself, but this doesn’t mean, that I don’t hear and see, how everyone is going insane. I am not someone shouting in the desert. If you happen to read this, you must know, your DL is ruining your life, as well as the lives of the people you say you care about. You lie on a permanent basis, as your DL doesn’t allow you to be truthful. The only way for you, to get back on track with yourself, is to talk out loud with yourself and to listen to the sound of your own voice. Only then, you will be able to hear the difference between your DL and EL. I didn’t invent the DL/EL distinction, but I discovered it. Many people have unsuccessfully tried to address EL.

 

Your EL can only be addressed with your EL and my EL or anyone else’s EL, isn’t going to be any good to you, unless you can get to your own EL. Since you don’t know the difference between your own DL and your own EL, you are in vain trying to address your DL with your DL. As long as you are trying to do that, you are shooting yourself in the foot. DL is utterly self-defeating. Regardless of how, presumably, successful you are, you are tormented by what you call your mind, the inevitable fantasy of inner language, which occurs due to your frustrating, dull, unconscious DL.

 

Surely, your DL can only be properly addressed with your ongoing EL, in which you listen to the sound of your own voice, while you speak. You haven’t done this. Rather than admitting this, you keep asking questions – to yourself and to others – to avoid doing what needs to be done. When you really listen to yourself, you are not asking any questions, as you are simply talking. Of course, there is no inner you, as a speaker, who speaks, with the inner you, as a listener, as there is only the act of listening while you speak or speaking, while you simultaneously listen.

 

The speaker is the listener and the other is you. Of course, these are merely some simple words, to address the conundrum of our common way of talking – DL – in which listening to others or making others listen to us, is more important than listening to ourselves. We never listen to ourselves in DL and we are disconnected from our own experience. Unintelligent, automatic, coercive, unnatural, intimidating, superficial, effortful, awful-sounding, dissociative speech continues to waste your time and energy.

 

I write this because I want to and I always like what I say. Nobody can say it as I do, because I have EL. What everyone says is meaningless to me, because they engage in DL. I stand alone and I challenge everyone to talk with me. It is disgusting, that people demand money, just for some talking. Therapy or psychiatry is a phony enterprise. All professional speaking is a joke. None of them know anything about the DL/EL distinction. I don’t ask anything from anyone but invite everyone to explore their EL with me.

 

I already have what I want, that is why I don’t engage anymore in your needy, demanding DL. I withdraw from your fake-conversations, which are harmful and inevitably escalating into violence. I am fine on my own with my EL. I know exactly what I want, and I have it, every day. I hear in the sound of your voice, that you are unhappy, dissatisfied, distracted, defensive and deluded. If you talk with me, all that will change. You’ll be surprised, how soon you’ll be done with DL and enjoy your EL, which reveals your LE. This is what you must do now. Go to skype and contact me. 

My skype name is limbicease. I chose that name, when I took a class in neuroscience. The limbic system is a group of structures in your brain that regulate your emotion, behavior, motivation and memory. It is also known as the emotional nervous system, because it connects your physical and emotional wellbeing. With EL, you induce the regulation of your autonomic nervous system. My skype name is limbicease, because with EL your limbic system is at ease. You can also check out my two You Tube Channels: Maximus Peperkamp or maximuspeperkamp-hw8sw   

 Love,

 

Talk about love is nonsense without Embodied Language (EL). You can hear it in someone’s voice, if there is love or not. We engage, unknowingly, in Disembodied Language (DL) and, therefore, our language doesn’t match with the experience of love. As long as we go on with DL, we can’t love and keep failing at expressing what should be considered as the most important experience of our lives. Although everyone can hear the great difference between DL and EL, due to DL, we don’t pay close enough attention to the sound of our voice, to recognize the sound of love. 

 

When we have ongoing EL, there is no need at all to say: I love you. Our love is not expressed by loving words, but by our loving sounds. Loving words are meaningless, when spoken with the sound of stress, anxiety, fear, confusion, distraction, sadness or hype. In DL we, unconsciously, sound negative and that is why we try to say, supposedly, loving things.

 

From the previous paragraph, the three main reasons, why we don’t listen to ourselves, when we engage in DL, are very clear. 1) In the name of love, we speak, presumably, loving words, to the loved one. However, due to our outward orientation, we want the other to listen to us, but we are not listening to ourselves. We direct all our attention to the other. This is why people speak about losing themselves in love. Also, we do everything, to get the attention from the person we, supposedly, love. 2) During DL, we struggle to get the listener’s attention. And this struggle prevents us from listening to ourselves. In DL, we are, unknowingly, always experiencing many negative emotions. We struggle to come across in a positive manner, but we are conflicted, between how we perceive ourselves and how the person we love might see us. 3) Although we speak poetic words of love, we are fearful of being rejected. We try to find the right words and are endlessly obsessing about every word that is being said. This verbal fixation prevents us from listening to ourselves. The worst thing is, that we are trying to sound loving. In EL, we don’t try to sound loving, but we sound loving.

 

People become a couple, or they marry, because they love each other. However, in DL everything is always about love for each other, but in EL we are able to talk about love for ourselves. Due to our EL, we love each other, because we actually love ourselves. This is so radically different from the so-called love we believe to be having with our DL. In DL, in which we sound demanding and needy, we don’t love ourselves, as we can’t love ourselves, because our DL doesn’t allow us to express what we really feel. Therefore, in DL, we need others to love us. This may, perhaps, work for a while, but it is unhealthy, if we don’t love ourselves and expect the other to love us.

 

When we talk out loud with ourselves and listen carefully to the sound of our own voice, we will engage, all alone, in ongoing EL, and for the first time, experience the immense beauty of being able to love ourselves, with our own language. Now we are able to give to ourselves, what we always wanted from others. Loving ourselves with our EL, is a delightful matter, which makes us realize our Language Enlightenment (LE).

 

Whenever we have heard or read about some, supposedly, great love affair, it was always some sentimental, overrated, exaggerated, fabricated sob-story, which was, inevitably, based on our ubiquitous DL. With EL, we will not have any love affair, as the person who engages in EL, is able to love him or herself. Surely, such people will be very loving to each other, but their relationship is of a completely different magnitude, because they never interfere with each other. Love only exists in freedom, which comes with our ongoing EL.

 

With DL, we keep entertaining the illusion, that success depends on our intelligence, motivation or persistence, but with EL, all our actions are born out of love. Whatever was achieved with the, presumed, unconditional love or support of others, turns out to be irrelevant to us, once we are able to have EL. Nobody who engaged in DL, has ever helped us to have EL. We had to leave all those people, who we believed loved us. Our journey with our EL illustrates, nobody has ever loved us, like we can love ourselves. With EL, we break the greatest taboo: we love ourselves.

 

Here are my comments on what a few famous people said about love. Osho, formerly known as Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, said… love makes no conditions, no ifs, no buts. Love never says: fulfill these requirements, then I love you. Love is like breathing, when it happens, you are simply love. It does not matter who comes close to you, the sinner or the saint. Whosoever comes close to you starts feeling the vibe of love, is rejoiced. Love is unconditional giving - but only those who are capable of giving who have…As you can tell, Osho doesn’t know about EL, because EL – without which there cannot be any love – definitely has requirements. It is only for those, who listen to themselves, while they speak. Everyone unconsciously engages in DL and when they come close to anyone who has EL, they remain ignorant about their love. Moreover, EL – or love – doesn’t magically happen, but we make it happen, that is, we do it, skillfully, consciously and thus, we know we do it. Furthermore, once we come to find out about the gigantic difference between our DL and EL, we are done with the total bullshit called unconditional giving. In DL, however, we remain busy with giving to others, that is why DL must stop before we can have EL.

 

J. Krishnamurti said…Love comes into being when the mind is naturally quiet, not made quiet, when it sees the false as false and the true as true. When the mind is quiet, then whatever happens is the action of love, it is not the action of knowledge. Knowledge is mere experience and experience is not love. Experience cannot know love…Krishnamurti, like Osho, speaks repeatedly about the mind, but with EL, we know mind never existed, as it was merely the fantasy about inner language that was created and maintained by our DL. In other words, Krishnamurti also doesn’t know about the DL/EL distinction. However, neither our imaginary – covert – inner speech, nor our audible – overt – speech needs quieting. Our DL will only stop, once we have recognized it as such, that is, once we know the difference between our DL and EL. We are never quieting our insensitive, noisy DL. Krishnamurti rails against knowledge, but it isn’t knowledge, which prevents love, but how we deal with language, due to DL, our usual unnatural way of talking. According to Krishnamurti, knowledge is experience and experience is not love, but in EL, there is nothing wrong with our knowledge or with our experience. In fact, knowledge and experience are necessary conditions to be able to have EL.  

 

The Dutch Advaita Vedanta guru, Alexander Smit, had an intense confrontation, in Bombay, India, with his guru, Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, who got incredibly angry with him, because, according to him, Alexander wasn’t serious enough. He screamed and threw the presents Alexander had brought for him on the ground. Presumably, that was when the authority was transmitted. Such nonsense. Back in the days, I went to one of the so-called Satsangs by this Alexander Smit, in which he pulled the exact same shit on me, as his former so-called guru had pulled on him. He got angry with me for the exact same reasons, and I also believed, I had become self-realized. However, looking back on my own experience, as well as the experience, which Smit himself later described with Nisargadatta, it is very clear, that all this non-duality bullshit, is based on coercion and manipulation and, therefore, on DL. After that confrontation with Nisargadatta, Alexander wrote him a long letter of apology and then he was allowed back in. He wrote very obediently, slavishly and ignorantly, to the overpowering, authoritarian, absolutely stupid, Nisargadatta: I want to be here in love. Astonishingly, this was all I could find Smit has ever said about love. Surely, EL is not about convincing or confronting. Anyone who knows about the difference between DL and EL, will avoid oppressive DL, because our DL and EL never meet. At the time, that I met Smit, I was still struggling with my own authority issues with father. It was due to my EL, that I figured out, I could give to myself, what neither my father nor Smit could give to me. There’s no love in Advaita Vedanta, all you get is people imitating each other.

You can also check out my two You Tube channels  maximuspeperkamp-hw8sw or maximus peperkamp                      

 

Overboard,

 

Why do so many people go overboard? There is a reason. Why is the world is getting crazier, day by day? It is because of how we talk. Our usual way of talking is driving us mad. We engage in Disembodied Language (DL) and we are out of touch with ourselves. We don’t realize this is happening. Even if we did, we wouldn’t know how to change it, so we accept DL as normal.

 

Anyone who takes time, to speak with him or herself and listen to him or herself, would find out, that a different way of talking is possible and necessary. When we hear the sound of our own voice, while we speak, we engage in a new way of communicating, because we experience the immediate relaxing, wholesome effects of our Embodied Language (EL). By switching from DL to EL, we step out of all the madness, and we understand, why we went overboard. We did what we did, because we wanted something else, but we didn’t know, how to get to it. With EL we finally know what we had always wanted.

 

Going overboard isn’t a good thing, as you will drown. You have, unknowingly, been drowning in your DL. Only EL is going to prevent this from happening. I want everyone, who got addicted to drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, crime or some other maladaptive behavior, to know, that they went overboard, because they actually wanted to have EL. Even all those mental health clients or homeless people, with their endless dramas, abuse, depression, mania, psychosis, paranoia or anxiety, are constantly going nuts, because nobody knows how to have EL. The fact, that we don’t know how to have it, doesn’t mean, we don’t want it. Surely, unless we have EL, we will go overboard again, because this is the only way, we know how to deal with our horrific DL.

 

I've studied psychology, I've worked in the field, and I've taught psychology for many years. In my view, there is a point, why so many people want to, unconsciously, go overboard. Nobody knows how to produce ongoing EL. All the problems, which were created by our DL, are presumably remediated, with more of the same stupid DL. It is infuriating, demotivating and gas-lighting, that psychology hasn’t produced anything useful. The entire discipline is based on nonsense, purported by DL. I just read that Enloe Behavioral Health – this name is of course a big joke – in my hometown, Chico, California, where I got my feet wet, as an enthusiastic, naïve, undergraduate psychology student, is closing shop. Good riddance. They only medicate everyone. All so-called mental health professionals are idiots, who refuse to acknowledge the difference between DL and EL.

 

Everyone who, in one way or another, is going overboard, is actually ahead of their time. They have every right, to reject things, the way they are. As far as I am concerned, they are not losers or basket-cases, because they are right, that something is fundamentally wrong in our society. I have always been intrigued by people, who don’t keep it together, who go overboard, because they are more open to EL, than those who are ‘normal’. This is no coincidence. When I talked with them, I’ve always found, they were very strongly against DL. Apparently, they held out hope for something better, but nevertheless they got crushed by the ubiquitous, destructive force of our DL.

 

In Greek mythology, Sirens are beautiful women with bird-like features, who attracted the sailors with their voices and yanked them overboard. Presumably, their haunting songs, were echoing across the vast expanse of the sea, promising wisdom, but it led to a watery grave. Sirens are a symbol for so-called dangerous temptation embodied by beautiful women. The word Siren has a pre-Greek origin, seira, rope, cord or eiro, to tie, to join, fasten, binding, entangling, one who binds or entangles through magic song.

 

There is something very interesting about these tempting Sirens, who lured these mariners to their doom. Their mesmerizing melodies were full of sorrow, longing and despair and appealed to the dreadful DL, everyone has always been going through since the beginning of time. Their deadly songs – about knowledge, insight, understanding and salvation – enchanted those who heard them. You could say they promised ongoing EL and, also Language Enlightenment (LE). When it was already too late, they dragged them overboard into the deep. 

Another salient detail of Odysseus’ story is, he was warned by the sorceress Circe – supposedly, someone who knew about the difference between DL and EL – for the treacherous hypnotic voices of these Sirens. Odysseus took precautions and ordered his crew to plug their ears with beeswax, thus protecting them from the Siren’s DL. Odysseus knew his own insatiable curiosity and desire for knowledge and, therefore, he had himself tied to the mast of his ship, so he could hear the Sirens’ song, but would not succumb to its pull. It reminds me of my psychology-study, which would have endlessly distracted me from my EL. Luckily, I didn’t become a psychologist, and I gave up teaching psychology during the Covid pandemic, because I didn’t like online-teaching.

 

Once you recognize the immense difference between your own DL and EL and begin to have ongoing EL, you will come to acknowledge the devastating fact, that everyone is, unknowingly, engaging in DL. And everyone is, inadvertently, trying to address DL with DL, which, of course, results into more DL and more people going insane. In DL, we all go overboard with what we say, but we ignore how we say it.    

 

Tranquility,

 

Whenever you hear or read about tranquility, you almost immediately relate it to something spiritual, religious, mystical or philosophical, but this is, because you engage, unconsciously, every day, in Disembodied Language (DL), in which there can be no tranquility. With DL, you are in a constant turmoil, because you imagine, that language happens inside of you or that you have thoughts or a mind. 

Although there are no sentences or words anywhere inside of you, the belief, that you can have an inner conversation with yourself, is so strong, because you would really like to say and hear what you believe to be thinking, but your DL doesn’t allow you to do that. However, if you would be able to have Embodied Language (EL), you would overcome your tenacious belief a behavior-causing inner self and experience your life in a peaceful way, because you say what you want to say and are capable of saying. With ongoing EL tranquility is simply your natural way of being. The beauty of EL is, you can hear it in the sound of your voice.

 

Recognizing your tranquility, with your ongoing EL, makes you aware of who you are. With EL, your attention effortlessly and naturally goes to the serene sound of your voice. You do nothing to produce this sound. You have this resonant sound, because you are at peace with yourself. You have never used this sound to speak with. What will you say, when you identify this voice and say with this voice, what you can only say with this voice? And what will you do, after you have given yourself instructions with this voice? You will do exactly, as you have said you would.

 

The congruence between your conscious way of using your language and all your other behavior results in the increase of your tranquility. Nothing can produce your tranquility, as your EL can. Your EL is more than merely speaking, as it involves listening, while you speak. Also, to maintain your EL, in spoken form, you need to write about your EL, so that you can read it. Spontaneous expression and fluid formulation of EL in spoken form, needs to be documented, made solid and further elaborated on, in written form, so that all four aspects of your language – speaking, listening, writing and reading – have been fully covered.

 

Traditionally, various folklores have used texts to, supposedly, achieve tranquility, but since the difference between DL and EL has never been properly addressed – with EL – we have never used our own writing, about our own ongoing EL, to experience and enhance our tranquility. Moreover, due to our habitual involvement in DL, we experience tranquility, as a movement away from our language, rather than a movement into our language. However, in EL, there is no inner language or mind, as there is only the switch from DL to EL, which dissolves our DL-created-illusion. The experiential nature of our phony tranquility is, due to our DL, believed to involve a so-called spiritual or meditative process of quieting the mind. Yet, we all experience moments, in which we feel tranquil, we have an intuitive sense of what it is, but our insensitive, mechanical, dull DL doesn’t capture it and thus, it disturbs our experience.

 

With EL we can finally talk about our tranquility to our heart’s content. This is such a nourishing, healing, ecstatic, enlightening event. As a result of our ongoing EL, our tranquility no longer slips through our fingers. In other words, we are not anymore struggling to define it, to share it or to hang on to it. With ongoing EL tranquility lasts, as it reveals our Language Enlightenment (LE).

 

The common notion of inner peace is based on the falsehood of the subsidence or quieting of our private speech. As stated, there exists no inner language, but DL makes us imagine, that we have a covert conversation with ourselves. If we would ask ourselves – out loud – what is this presumed inner self, who supposedly, inwardly, is inaudibly talking, we are puzzled, confused or even crazy? And, who, inside of us, is having a conversation with who? One answer always only results in even more questions and on and on, because we are in the fantasyland of the psychotic, in which we quite literally believe to be hearing voices. We speak about thoughts, but the fact is, we are imagining inner speech. Only during EL, while we talk out loud with ourselves and listen to ourselves, do we get clear about the many fabrications our DL. 

 

The tranquility of EL is so wonderful, you won’t want to leave it. Although you’ll lose it again and again, you will look for it and find it, as you know, you will find it, by speaking with yourself and listening to yourself. You’ll go through whatever it takes, to have EL, because your LE – your ongoing EL – implies lasting tranquility. The times of despair are behind you, once you have acknowledged the enormous difference between your DL and EL. Your EL keeps steadily increasing, while your DL becomes less and less and, although you do, whatever it takes to make this happen, it feels as if this is happening by itself. Naturally, your EL keeps unfolding and showing, you are new, but you know, you do it, you have transformed.

 

Tranquility is a behavior, like breathing, which goes on with everything you do. During EL, your breathing, like your voice, is regular, deep and calm, but during DL, you hyperventilate, or you are holding your breath. Moreover, when you truly pay attention to how you sound in DL, you never like to hear the sound of your anger, fear, confusion, sadness, frustration or pretention.

 

With DL, we just don’t take the time, to enjoy our tranquility, but with EL, we finally allow ourselves to recognize and fully enjoy our own gracefulness. In principle, we can all see the beautiful sunset, hear the birds sing or smell the roses, but these effortless moments don’t register, because of our DL. When we, for the first time, discover the difference between our DL and EL, we are delighted, that we can pay attention to whatever asks our attention, as we can hear and feel, our ongoing EL deepens our tranquility.       

 

Dishonesty,

 

In each language there is a word for dishonesty. However, it isn’t – as we tend to believe, with our unnatural Disembodied Language (DL) – a person, who is honest or dishonest, but it is the kind of language, which is used, which is honest or dishonest. Our effortless Embodied Language (EL) is the language of honesty, but our usual, automatic, insensitive, effortful, energy-draining DL, is the language of dishonesty. Our DL and EL are different languages, like Italian and German.

 

Although, of course, it sounds ridiculous to say, that Italian is the language of lies, but German is the language of truth, within Italian, there is DL-Italian and EL-Italian and in German, there is DL-German as well as EL-German. We have not considered, let alone explored, these two very different patterns of behavior, that exist within each language, as such an undertaking requires that we stop our DL and engage in ongoing EL.

 

Res turpis is the Latin term for dishonesty. Res (noun), meaning, things, matter, business or reality, and turpis (adjective), meaning, ugly, filthy, foul, disgraceful or deformed. Other Latin words are: fraus (noun), fraud, deceit, trick, duplicity; improbitas (noun), depravity, badness, immorality, bad quality, rascality; inliberalitas (noun), dishonesty, unworthy conduct; improbitatis (noun), dishonesty. The thing to get from this writing, is that with DL, we simply cannot be honest. Moreover, trying to be honest, isn’t honesty. In EL, we are not trying to be honest, because we are honest.

 

Dishonesty – which, in our usual, unconscious, scripted way of talking, is viewed as the act or practice of being intentionally deceptive or not fully truthful in some way – is experienced very differently during DL or EL. The aforementioned description clearly derives from DL, because in EL, we would say, dishonesty is determined by a person’s inability to listen to the sound of his or her voice, while he or she speaks. Moreover, in EL, we don’t accuse anyone, who has DL of not listening to him or herself, as that would mean, we are again engaging in DL. However, in DL, we always accuse someone of being dishonest and, consequently, we continue with our DL, that is, we never become honest and engage in EL, as long as we still punish each other with our DL.

 

During DL, we endlessly attack the other person for his or her presumed dishonesty, because we assume, that they are intentionally deceiving or misleading us, by telling us lies, omitting parts of the truth or twisting the truth, but once we have EL, we realize – to our big surprise – that everyone – yes, everyone! – engages in DL unconsciously, and, therefore, unintentionally.

 

Once we recognize the immense difference between our DL and our EL, we acknowledge, we have been lying to ourselves and to others with our DL. Moreover, once we recognize the difference between our DL and our EL, we no longer want to have DL, as we prefer to have EL, so that we can recover from our dishonesty.

 

Another unaddressed aspect of why we can’t be honest as long as we engage in DL – which, as I have repeatedly stated in previous writings, is group-behavior – is that honesty, in our usual DL, is considered a key element of pro-sociality. In other words, our honesty is always directed at others, but not to ourselves. We overrate the importance of prosocial behavior, in which we intend to benefit others or society as a whole, because this means, we forget about ourselves.

 

Since we have never been able to address and fully understand – with our EL – the difference between DL and EL, we tend to exaggerate the importance of prosocial behavior and we are inclined to misjudge antisocial behavior, which, in essence, is a failed attempt, at caring about ourselves. With ubiquitous DL, we have never – yes, never (!) – been able to truly care about ourselves and this problematic inability, to care about ourselves, keeps us busy with others or with animals, to, presumably, care about them.

 

Many aspects of dishonesty are based on lies, which we have been told – and which we are currently told – about our so-called social behavior. While it surely is important, to have empathy and concern about the welfare and rights of others, to be cooperative and fair, it is quite another thing, to view the world through idealistic-pro-social-colored glasses. Make no mistake, the term pro-social has grown into a globalist-political-communistic movement, which preaches a world without borders, but is willing sacrifice, the hard-won freedoms of the individual. We have never experienced ongoing EL and we haven’t been taking good care about ourselves. Instead of working for social change and remaining busy with others, we must bring attention to ourselves, by speaking out loud with ourselves and by listening to ourselves. We only experience so-called psychological safety, if we can engage in ongoing EL, the language of our individuality, intelligence and honesty. Our usual DL is an outdated ancient group-behavior, which cultivates and perpetuates our dishonesty.       

 

Family,

 

The unit of every society – around the world – is still the family, not the individual. Although people have achieved individual freedoms, in  Western Democratic societies, these hard-won freedoms are evaporating, in front of their very eyes, because they have never acknowledged the difference between Disembodied Language (DL) – which can be called the language of the group or the family – and Embodied Language (EL) – which is the language of the individual.

 

Regardless of whether we are fortunate enough to live in a culture of so-called freedom or in an oppressive, autocratic or totalitarian culture, we all engage, unconsciously, in DL. Those, who live in ‘free’ societies are better off than those who are not, as only they can enjoy these individual freedoms. However, if we consider the negative effects of DL, they are just as much deprived as those, who don’t live in societies where there is individual freedom. The dumb language of the family – DL – still dominates every individual.  

 

Irrelevant of where one happens to be born or where one happens to live one’s life, human beings have behaved neurotically, pretentiously, problematically, mechanically and insensitively, while making it seem as if family-life is man’s ultimate achievement. It is no coincidence, that our unintelligent DL can be found everywhere and has never been properly addressed with EL.

 

The history of the noun family is interesting, in that it refers to obligation, lack of freedom and subservience. In the 15^th century family meant “servants of a household” from Latin familia “family servants, domestics collectively, the servants in a household” thus also “members of a household, the estate, property; the household including relatives and servants”, abstract noun formed from famulus “servant, slave.” In Latin, the word family rarely appears in the sense “parents with their children” for which “domus (see domestic, adj.) was used. Derivatives of famulus include famula “serving woman, maid”, famulanter “in the manner of a servant”, famulitas “servitude”, familiaris “of one’s household, private”, familiaricus “of household slaves”, familiaritas “close friendship” (from Online Etymology Dictionary).

 

Surely, it would, of course, be wonderful, if there could truly be, one big happy family, a family, that is characterized by happiness and harmony, but the unaddressed reality is, we are conditioned to have DL by our families. Our EL never really gets a chance, because it is treated as anti-social and punished. We were taught, in DL, that listening means: listening to others, but not listening to ourselves. To be able to listen to ourselves, we must talk with ourselves, to hear ourselves, but, in DL, talking only means: talking with others, but not, talking with ourselves. Said differently, in our family, we are taught to listen to authority outside ourselves, but no attention is given to speaking with ourselves and listening to ourselves. Such attention is only produced, if you talk with me, as no one with DL stimulates someone else to have EL, only someone with EL can do that. This is behaviorism 101: behavior is reinforced by its consequences. Someone with DL is incapable of reinforcing EL and, yes, only someone who has it can reinforce EL of others.

 

In every society, around the world, people have  been romanticizing about the presumed virtues of family-life. The fact, however, is that our EL could never emerge in our family. Moreover, it could only reveal itself to anyone, who is really sick and tired of the DL, which is perpetuated by our family. I myself was in that position and I was feeling very troubled for many years, as the only way to continue my EL, was to disconnect from my family, who seemed to drag me into DL again and again. It was for this reason, I didn’t want to create my own family, as I wanted to be able to pursue, what, according to me, no one has ever pursued, namely, his or her own ongoing EL.  

 

It runs in the family. Yes, DL runs in every family. These language traits are behaviors, which are passed from one generation to the next. If we are going to have EL, in the future, it will not be passed on by our family. The family’s focus on others is the biggest stand in the way for EL. EL is only for the individual, who can be alone with him or herself. Religious people retreated from their family, from societies, into monasteries, caves, mountains, forests or ashrams, but they have never considered the difference between their DL and EL, so that they could continue EL. They seek to undo the ties, which burden and bind, but they never succeed in going beyond their so-called mind, as they don’t acknowledge the language of dissatisfaction, which is our DL.

 

In spite of what people claim, the principles and beliefs of what even the best family considers to be important, the so-called family values, are a sure recipe for a life-long, self-undermining behavioral pattern. It is because DL was never addressed by our EL, we haven’t acknowledged this. These morals are emphasized, because, in reality, something is missing. Honesty, respect and a good sense of humor, don’t need to be addressed, if we are going to have ongoing EL.

 

The famous saying, family comes first, says it all. We have always sacrificed our individuality for our family. Although the family or the tribe was important to survive, in a modern free society, we urgently need to now abandon any kind of tribalism, if we want our culture of individual freedom to survive. This makes the difference between our DL and EL the quintessential issue of our time. When we keep prioritizing our family above all else, group behavior will triumph over individual behavior.

 

Unity is indeed crucial for a family’s survival. As the saying goes: a house divided cannot stand. But, how can we be at peace with each other, if we are not at peace with ourselves? Due to our unconscious DL, we make this so-called peace with others more important, than peace with ourselves. Although we may say: home is where the heart is, my heart is only beating in my own body. To feel my heart, I must speak with and hear myself. Supposedly, no matter where our life takes us, home is where the heart is, with our family, but this determines, that we are all over the place, which is what happens in DL.

 

Overrated family ties, kept through thick and thin, symbolize a chronic lack of boundaries. Tight-knit families are believed to be close and strongly united, but the reality is, everyone is enmeshed and into each other’s business. On the one hand, secrets can never stay secrets for very long, within the family, but, on the other hand, secrets of dysfunctionality and abuse are shamefully and guiltily hidden from outsiders. I was always treated as an outsider in my family, because I wanted EL.  If you like to hear me read this writing, go to my You Tube Channel: maximuspeperkamp-hw8sw

 

Connecting The Dots,

 

Besides, understanding something and piecing together hints and other bits of information, to see the relationship and to get a clearer picture of what is really happening, connecting the dots also simply refers to drawing a line between dots, as part of a children’s activity to create an illustration or design. Whenever we speak of connecting the dots, we are actually trying to refer to Embodied Language (EL), to the language which makes sense to us. However, since we don’t know anything about the difference between our Disembodied Language (DL) and our EL, we unknowingly try to connect the dots with DL – which, of course, doesn’t work – because we don’t know how to have EL, so we, basically, only pretend to have EL, while, in reality, we are engaging in DL.

 

Surely, to connect the dots requires that we must acknowledge the existence of both our DL as well as our EL. DL refers to our history of conditioning, our past, while EL always refers to our present and our future. Naturally, if our DL isn’t stopped, DL is our past, present and future and, whether we believe it or not, this is what DL has so far always been. Once we get started on EL, however, DL is only our past.

 

Although our conditioning history with DL, may rear its end again in the present, once we have come to know the great difference between our DL and EL, we know, that DL, expressed by our EL, is our past. Connecting the dots with our EL, we realize, that we have kept trying to express our problematic DL with our DL and this never resulted in EL, consequently, we kept projecting our DL into the future, no matter how convinced we were, we would put it behind us.

 

Unfortunately, connecting the dots is, due to our DL, considered as a strategic, cunning process, by which some specialistic, skillful, scripted communicators add so-called value to some organization. From this description it is immediately clear, we are dealing with a group-process and not with what serves the wellbeing of any one particular individual. In other words, connecting the dots, is usually explained as the cultivation of the habit or discipline of seeing – oddly, never of the hearing – of interconnections between issues, information, trends, which seem unrelated, because they have nothing to do with us. Connecting the dots, is the perfect way of avoiding our own issues and that is what we do with our DL.

 

By connecting the dots, we acquire knowledge, but we don’t develop self-knowledge, because we keep pretending, that our knowledge is more important than our missing self-knowledge. With EL, on the other hand, we acquire self-knowledge, which is embedded in scientific knowledge. Connecting the dots with EL, makes us realize that self-knowledge and scientific knowledge have to be related. As long as there is no connection, between our scientific knowledge and our so-called self-knowledge, we are bound to misuse our scientific knowledge, because our so-called self-knowledge is actually ignorance.

 

Another often-heard aspect about connecting the dots is that, presumably, it is a mind-set. Here, we make it seem, as if there is language going on inside our body, in our head. This is complete nonsense. There are no words to be found anywhere in our brain and there exists no mind or a mind-set, these are fictitious concepts. In DL, we cannot speak in the way we want to speak and are able to speak, therefore, we get carried away by the fantasy about private speech. There is no me, inside of me, who talks with him or herself, who reasons with him or herself. All of this is make-believe of DL. In EL, we listen to ourselves while we speak and that connects the dots, as we realize, the so-called speaker is, of course, the listener. There is neither a listener, who listens, nor a speaker, who speaks. These constructs are figures of speech, which, due to DL, we believe really exist. So, there is no mind, no thought, no self, no psyche, no personality, no ego, no being, no soul. There is only overt language – speaking, listening, reading or writing – and there is no covert language.

 

DL gave us the so-called communication strategists, who presumably connect the dots, by seeing things holistically. All of this is hogwash. All our famous, ridiculously called, ‘professional’ speakers, engage in DL, like everyone else. Even the highest educated professors, scientists, psychiatrists, psychologists or philosophers don’t know anything about ongoing EL and can at best sell us new wine in old bags. This is a parable from the Bible, which means new ideas or practices - EL - cannot be contained in old structures or traditions. Old wineskins - DL - are brittle and cannot handle the expansion of new wine, so both, the wine and the wineskins would be lost. For someone like me, who has EL, connecting the dots always means listening to myself while I speak.