December 10, 2014

December 10, 2014

Written by Maximus Peperkamp, M.S. Verbal Engineer

Dear Reader, 

It is less and less the case that this writer is upset about the fact that other people are having Noxious Verbal Behavior (NVB). This used to be the case all the time. He often felt left out because he wanted another communication. When this didn’t occur, he would protest or say something which would make others reject him. He has learned not to do that anymore. This doesn’t mean he is now capable of changing others, but it definitely means he is better at keeping himself out of trouble. One of the reasons he is able to do that is because he understands that people have a particular history due to which they can basically only have NVB. In a sense, he is more forgiving because he understands that they are incapable of doing anything else. Another way of viewing things is that he no longer takes things so personal. Whenever people are having NVB he doesn’t join, but simply listens. 

He doesn’t try as hard anymore, because it is not going anywhere. All of the above is in line with Sound Verbal Behavior (SVB), which is based on active avoidance. In the presence of aversive stimulation, it is natural to avoid rather than to come closer. Due to the environment in which he grew up, this writer was not able to avoid and, consequently, his nervous system adjusted to the proximity of the aversive stimulation of his abusive father. This tendency, to stay close to the noxious stimulus and to address the noxious stimulus in an attempt to gain support, has led to many problems in this author’s life. Ever since this author has stopped having contact with his family, his nervous system has slowly adjusted to being away permanently from the aversive stimulation of his father and from everyone else who was abused by him, but who nevertheless still protected him. 

Before, this author wasn’t able to avoid aversive stimulation and he would still instead approach. Currently, his approach behaviors are less than ever before. He used to have a lot of approach behaviors, but these days he has minimal amounts of approach behaviors. The reason for this is that his needs are met by his current way of life. He has two fulfilling jobs, one full time job as a case manager with parolees and one part time job as a psychology instructor. Furthermore, he has many friends and healthy activities, such as working out in the gym, hiking, bike-riding, writing, skyping, organizing seminars, which he is happily involved in. It is a huge relief to this author that his approach behaviors have finally decreased. He has stopped begging or demanding to be accepted.

Another behavior which he is much less involved in than before is escape behavior. Such behavior was inevitable once he got close to the aversive stimulus. It still happens on occasion, but it happens less and less. As his avoidance behaviors have increased and improved, his escape behaviors have decreased as well, because they were no longer necessary as much. Increase of avoidance behaviors has also led to an improvement of avoidance behaviors. By being more focused on avoiding rather than solving problems, this writer has found that his life has become much easier. 

At this point, this writer’s avoidance behavior is stronger than ever. Approximately 70% is avoidance, 20% is approach behavior and only 10% is escape behavior. This is a remarkable achievement given his reactivity in the past. The essence of the problem this writer was struggling with for so long was that he couldn’t resist the temptation of coming closer to the aversive stimulus. Even if he tried not to do this, he would still do it. He needed behavioral science to understand why this was happening. Without the knowledge that this was the way in which his body had been conditioned, he would have gone insane. Moreover, without knowing that his body responds to the environment in which it finds itself, even if this means an imagined threat or sense of safety, he would have continued to make himself responsible and undermine himself. The notion that we are not responsible for our own behavior, but that the environment sets the stage for us to behave in a particular way, took away the stress this writer was feeling as long as he thought and believed that he needed to change. 

Now that his difficulties at long last have begun to get less, he realizes, how much others, who don’t know anything about behaviorism, have contributed to his trouble. He realizes how the lack of knowledge about behaviorism adds nothing but trouble for people who struggle with problems similar to the ones he had to deal with. The most problematic one is that individuals supposedly have free will. Nobody seems to realize how incredibly harmful this view is and how undermining and self-defeating it is to keep thinking this way. This writer is 56 years old, but it wasn’t until 2 years ago that he finally realized that he wanted to live a happier life he should sever all ties with his family. Due to B.F. Skinner's Radical Behaviorism, he was able to finally make this decision. Without reading his works, he would have never have been able to overcome his problems. His feverish approach behaviors would have been at 50% (or more), escape behavior 40%, because he got continuously in trouble and his active avoidance behavior would have been minimal, at only 10%.