Not,
Everyone knows, there are certain things
that you should not talk about, because it irrevocably leads to adverse
consequences that you do not want. So we can – to avoid bad consequences –
decide not to talk about things that could get us into trouble. It is one
thing, however, to stop talking to others about those difficult issues, but it
is quite another, to start talking to ourselves about what we do not want to or
cannot talk about with others.
Talking out loud to ourselves, about what
we cannot talk about with others, is the first step towards our Embodied
Language (EL). When we first do that, we are amazed, aggrieved and hurt, that
we can easily say anything to ourselves and we know very well, it should be
possible to say it to others in exactly the same way, but we don't, because we
don't want to break the usual pattern of expectations. We know from painful
experiences, that talking to others as if talking to ourselves is not allowed.
So, there is really nothing else we can do, than to tell ourselves about what
we could not or did not want to share with others. When we realize, however,
that our EL can hardly ever be shared with others, we will talk to ourselves in
a different way than when we still cherish the hope, that others, who only know
Disembodied Language (DL), would listen to us, in the same way as we have
listened to ourselves. This understanding of how things really are allows us to
let go of the other.
The understandable, obvious fact,
that we are unable to talk
to others in the same way
that we can talk to ourselves,
is accompanied by a sense
of frustration, dissatisfaction
and struggle we have about
this. No matter what we
do to get rid of that
negative, nasty feeling,
it doesn't ever go away.
As long as we keep
wanting that bad feeling
to go away, it will never
go away. When we talk
about our negative
experience, the word
consciousness often comes
up, as if these negative
experiences could be avoided,
if only we were finally
aware of ourselves. They
say: just look at it and
suppose, the absence of
that fantasized consciousness
would cause us to have
those bad experiences.
While it is never properly addressed in our
so-called unconscious DL, it is really the case that everyone - so to speak
unconsciously - struggles with exactly the same problem, which is therefore
solvable for everyone, by simply having EL, instead of DL. However, moving on effortlessly
with our own EL, never ever came about through prayer, meditation or magical,
higher, all-encompassing, divine, everlasting, exceptional consciousness, but
through verbal work, that is, determined, patient, attentive, goal-oriented and
free speaking aloud to ourselves, about anything and everything, which we
apparently were not allowed, which we supposedly couldn’t, didn’t dare to say
or didn’t want to talk about with others or with ourselves.
Only when we, while talking aloud to
ourselves, bring up for ourselves, what never came or could come to fruition,
in the so-called conversation with others, only then can we begin to really
experience what we have always experienced, but could not express in our own
words and pace earlier. There is no escaping the fact that all of us, because
of our hitherto undiscussed conditioning with DL, have been burdened with
negative, but, most strikingly, also with positive experiences, about which we
seemed to be unable to speak with others. So, if we continue to have EL, by
talking to ourselves, there will be an interpretation and understanding of
connections, we make with our language, between the causes and the consequences
of all our behavior.
It is often said, we miss what is happening
in the here and now, as we are too preoccupied with the past or the future. With
EL, we can explain this very differently, because we can talk with EL about our
DL and accept that, in spite of good intentions, any attempt to talk about DL
with DL was doomed to fail. Thus, in EL we make known to ourselves and to each
other the lawfulness of our behavior. The causes of our behavior always lie in
our past and the consequences of our behaviors – which occur in the here and
now – always lie in our future.
If we wonder, why others wouldn't listen to
EL, our answer is short and sweet: they do, but they are in denial about it. They
too hear EL, because that is what our ears are for, but they don’t talk about
it. So, with our ears, we always hear
ourselves as well as each other. In the genesis of our language, when we begin
to speak as nonverbal children, hearing ourselves, is still the same as hearing
each other. However, as we develop our verbal behavior, speaking the same
language becomes more and more important, but the innocent listening to the
other, in the same way that we listen to ourselves, receives less and less
attention, until it is, so to speak, completely out of our consciousness and seems
to have disappeared. When, at long last, we let ourselves know – by talking with
ourselves and by speaking in a listening manner – that we can only have EL with
those, who, like us, can talk aloud with themselves, then we stop being busy
with others, who only know DL and expect them to have EL with us. This releases
the ecstatic energy in us, which makes us speak or write jubilantly, as I do
here, about our Language Enlightenment (LE).