January 21, 2016

January 21, 2016

Written by Maximus Peperkamp, M.S. Verbal Engineer

Dear Reader,

I didn’t like the tone with which others were talking and each time I tried again to interact with those whose tone I didn’t like, I didn’t like my own tone either. The only communication which mattered to me was one in which my tone as well as the tone of others was enjoyable. This was a huge problem for me as the sound of the voice of others was not like that at all.  When I talked out loud by myself, however, I liked my own voice and I came to terms with my problem of rejection and misunderstanding. 

I was severely and to some extent still am handicapped as I was only able to understand what someone was saying if this person spoke with a voice which had a positive effect on me. When, out of deep frustration, I gave up on trying to talk with others, I began to listen to and hear myself. Around age 35 I identified the sound with which I wanted to speak. As this writing illustrates, I wasn’t stimulated to listen to my own voice as long as I was struggling with the negative effects of the voices of others.  This phenomenon is experienced by millions of people, who have never been able to put their finger on it and who are believed to have attentional problems, low self-esteem or all sorts of so-called mental illnesses. The fact is that this communication issue remains completely unaddressed.  

I don’t feel that big of an urge to talk with others anymore. I know that most people aren't able to have much Sound Verbal Behavior (SVB). As I became older, my need to talk out loud with myself also subsided. Then, as I started to write about these matters, my writing was first as intense as my speaking, but as the years went by that tension dissolved. Today’s writing is a milestone as it feels that tension has completely disappeared. I still like to write these words, which are meant to be read by others. If they read these words and hear their own sound they will recognize SVB.