Sacrifice,

 

Your usual way of talking, in which you, as a speaker, do not listen to yourself, is the language of sacrifice. Disembodied Language (DL) doesn’t allow you to say what you want to say and makes you postpone your wellbeing. Basically, you sacrifice yourself on the altar of the group you identify with, since your individuality isn’t expressed by your language.

 

Sacrifice comes from Latin sacrificium, which means to make sacred. It is also related to sacrificus, performing sacrifices and priestly functions or sacra, sacred rites and the word facere, to make or to do. Astonishingly, nobody is willing to admit, let alone explore, why we religiously devote ourselves to DL, which disconnects us from ourselves. In effect, we sacrifice both ourselves as well as each other.

 

When we engage in Embodied Language (EL), we come to terms with the fact, that we no longer want to sacrifice ourselves. We were told, it is honorable to sacrifice ourselves, to help or to save others, to achieve our challenging goals or to do the so-called right thing, but with EL, we realize, we have always short-changed ourselves. With EL, we find, it simply isn’t worth it, to sacrifice ourselves, which always goes hand in hand with putting in a lot of effort.

 

Throughout human history, there have been many  brave individuals, who sacrificed themselves, to advance the existence of the group, they felt, they belonged to, but as societies began to grant rights to each person, the tension grew between the goals of the individual and the goals of the group. It is this conflict, which is at the core of why we still engage mainly, unconsciously, in self-defeating, stupid DL, every day and don’t have the slightest notion, that our EL, is actually possible and very badly needed.

 

People have sacrificed everything for a variety of goals, which never paid off, but their insensitive DL prevents them from ever acknowledging, they have given up everything for nothing. It is definitely not a pretty picture, we have forsaken again and again our individual objectives, because, presumably, there were much more important matters, our family, our career, our belief in who we are as a people and our  spiritual understanding of who we supposedly are.

 

EL puts an end to all our superstitious sacrifice, as our individual path is more important, than what we were taught. Talking with ourselves – and having and enjoying our own ongoing EL – is considered to be more important, than talking with others and, inevitably, being trapped by DL. Stated differently, individual freedom trumps our allegiance to any group.  

 

The bottom line of those, who sacrifice themselves is, they always want or expect something in return, but they are never getting it. Yes, DL is the language of expectation and unfulfilled needs. The need to be needed, of course, underlies every sacrifice. If we  ever come to having ongoing EL, we will find, to our amazement, there is no need to sacrifice anything for anyone, as each of us takes care of themselves.  This is the crucial issue of individual responsibility, which should be the very basis of every society.

 

Everyone who unconsciously sacrifices themselves is always, inadvertently, guilt-tripping everyone else who didn’t. So, everyone with DL, constantly blames me or anyone with my EL, that I should, like them, be morally obligated to engage with them in DL, but my EL totally rejects this ludicrous proposition. I am not into being a martyr, as my EL is the antithesis to this outdated bullshit. DL is on its deathbed. I am not going to revive it back to life. To the contrary, I let it die and find it should have died, long time ago.

 

If there is such a thing as individualism, everyone would take care of themselves and there is really  no need at all for any sacrifice. Those who sacrifice themselves, don’t take care of themselves, that is the very core of our DL. They want others to care about them and always feel disappointed, because they never get what they hoped they would get.

 

We have all seen those pictures, of those who gave their lives, to supposedly save others. In their last horrific moments, they were depicted as if they had found eternal bliss, but this is not what happened. They felt betrayed and cheated, as they gave their life for nothing. Millions of lives have been wasted and still, we are further away from recognizing our EL, as the only way forward, more than ever before.  

 

It is very interesting to see and hear, that any kind of patriotism is nowadays, by many left-wing people, considered as having no self-respect. Yet, we may very well see the total collapse of everything we have supported as our common values, that is, the values of our individual freedom. Ultimately, any kind of sacrifice is just another stupid superstition, to supposedly defeat or cast out the bad influence that is threatening us. The reality is, our sacrifice has always backfired, and we are traumatized by it.                    

 

Garden,

 

I’m sitting in my garden and it is a lovely afternoon. The leaves have all been cleaned up and it feels so pleasant, to look at the patio, which is overgrown with green moss, after the rain. We have picked the giant grapefruits and the oranges and they taste delicious. These days are so relaxing and nourishing.

 

I don’t really mind, that I am still without a job and feel sure, that I will find something, which I can keep doing for another year or two. Bonnie is planning a vacation with her mother and her sister. I will be on my own for ten days then. I am happy, she is doing this, without me. Her mother is a piece of work. She is very bossy and domineering. Bonnie takes more after her father, who I loved so very much. This hard working, resourceful, modest man immediately took a liking in me. I cherish the wonderful times we had together. He passed away more than ten years ago. He had brain cancer and when they found out about it, it had already spread all over his brain.

 

My father-in-law had a short sick bed, which lasted only a couple weeks. He stayed in a house in San Francisco, where people who are mortally ill could go and spend their final days. The people who worked there were part of a Buddhist meditation center. We all gathered around his bed, when he blew out his last breath. It was such a beautiful experience. We were all crying, but the atmosphere was so serene, natural and honest. After the nurse ascertained he had passed away, we did a ritual.

 

Each of us had a cloth and we washed his body, taking that part from where we were standing. I was near his head and gently rubbed his forehead and cheeks. Others took care of his extremities. It lasted only minutes. It felt intimate and eternal. Although many tears were flowing, we were all very still. Only her brother was overwhelmed by emotion, and he left the room, we were in. You could hear him wail, as he went into the hallway. After her father had been ritually washed, his body was covered with a white sheet, and he would be prepared for his cremation. Something had changed in me, while I was at the deathbed of this marvelous man.

 

I was in the final phase of my psychology study for the Ph.D. and was writing on my dissertation and accruing my clinical hours, as a psycho-therapist. The mourning process made it clear to me, that I didn’t want to go on. I had been working so hard and pushing myself for so many years. Suddenly, I felt, I couldn’t carry on anymore. While Bonnie’s father had been such a great source of support and encouragement, it was not that I couldn’t have continued, I just no longer wanted to. It had been such an uphill battle and I was suffering so much.

 

Actually, there have been many of these seminal moments in my life, in which I knew, that from that time on, everything would be different. It always had to do, amazingly, with some kind of loss and my dissertation was about complicated bereavement. Grief is a natural response to the loss of a loved one. For most people, the symptoms of grief begin to decrease over time. However, for a small group of people, the feeling of intense grief persists, and the symptoms are severe enough to cause problems and stop them from continuing with their lives.

 

It is even a diagnosis now in the bible of psychiatry, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Health Disorders (DSM-5-TR), that prolonged grief disorder is characterized by intense and persistent grief that interferes with daily life. At the time, I was doing my practicum and giving therapy to fifteen, to twenty people a week, who were all having severe mental health problems.

 

Inadvertently, I was reminded of my own parents, from whom I have been estranged, for many years. They are very old and are ready to leave this life. I know, because my oldest sister once wrote it to me in a letter. One of these days, they will be gone and I haven’t made any effort anymore, to get talk with them. I have stopped being in touch with my family, as I want to continue with my Embodied Language (EL). They don’t show, they have any interest in it at all. To the contrary, the message I kept receiving was, that I just needed to drop my way of life and adjust or conform to and be with their way of life, which is based on the continuation of Disembodied Language (DL). I have tried to do so in the past, but it didn’t work for me and after many difficult years of frustration and re-traumatization, I gave up.

 

Perhaps, it is because I live far away, here in the United States, that I was able to abandon my own family. I have never been back to the Netherlands, since my immigration in 1999, but it is due to my family, that it is this way. I don’t blame anyone, but I simply want to go on living, the way I want to. My family always seems to believe, there’s something wrong with that. I have recovered from my trauma of being rejected, disrespected, blamed, abused and accused. Nobody is allowed to do that anymore. I continue with my EL and that determines my wellbeing. If I had not found my EL, I would have gone insane. Many people are literally driven insane by other people, because they keep having DL.

 

It took me many years, to understand, that although I was conditioned to have DL, I could leave behind my conditioning history with DL and continue with EL. I doubted my own ability many times, but I no longer do that. I was feeling incredibly tormented as a child, teen-ager and later in my twenties. I had no idea what to do or how to be in this life and I kept failing in so many things. I felt like a total failure.

 

I believed, I loved acting, but in acting school, I found out, I didn’t even want to act, as I wanted to be myself. I loved and still love singing and studied classical singing, but I gave up after one year at the  conservatorium. I studied psychology for many years, but I quit, luckily still with a master degree, which allowed me become a psychology instructor.  I’ve had many jobs, but always liked to do simple work, which wouldn’t involve technical or computer stuff. I have loved landscaping, park-maintenance and even swept the streets of my home town for many years. I just don’t like any complications or multitasking and these years of being a teacher were a real challenge from which I have gladly retired. The coming job will be my last job.      

I am reminded of a poem, which I wrote when I came the United States. 

Now that I am here

I know that for year after year

I have been avoiding my fear

Now that I see 

What is there inside of me 

I let it come out and be free

Now that I know

My trouble was just a big show

I can finally let it all go

Now that I feel

It is not a very big deal

I calmly step out of the wheel  

(I don't believe in language being - deep - inside of me anymore, as I have attained Language Enlightenment, which is based on the fact that all language is overt)  

 

Hermit,

 

I live in solitude and continue to do so, because that is how I choose to live. I am married and I love my wife, but we go about our own business, and this is why our marriage works. I wouldn’t say, I live in my own bubble, as that wouldn’t capture my reality. My freedom has nothing to do with any spirituality, as I am the master of my own Embodied Language (EL).

 

When I was a young boy, I cried a lot, because no one wanted to be my friend and, yet, I wanted to be everyone’s friend. While I have lived and worked in many different environments, I never really fit in or belonged to any group. I always found myself alone. In my early twenties, I discovered the reason, why I became some sort of hermit, as I heard, for the first time, in the sound of my own voice, the great difference between my Disembodied Language (DL) and my EL.

 

Nobody comes to me, as I don’t care about their DL and if I have a moment of contact with anyone, it is always because there can be, however briefly, some EL. I am a hermit and I refuse to spend my time with the nonsensical way of talking, which people accept as normal. I enjoy all the good things of life with my EL.

 

I don’t sit in some cave, far away from society, but I live, psychologically, in my Language Enlightenment (LE), which is my home. My solitude is needed, as it allows me to calmly express, again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again – I’m having such fun at this – again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again, my superb LE with my EL.

 

Perhaps, I say or write something, which applies to others, who are stuck in their horrible DL? You, who reads this, must recognize, you are wasting your life. You are pretty much brain-dead already, due to the common way of talking, which has made millions of people drink the cool aid. Before it is too late, speak with yourself and let yourself know, you can change.

 

I am an unusual, talkative, audacious hermit, who lives among people, but refrains from participating in DL, which goes against his interest. In DL, you make it seem, as if your words are not really yours, as you believe, your mind just keeps on going. This falsehood has to be stopped by you. I talk about it and I say: your thinking is madness. If you would say it and listen to it, you will get back to your senses.

 

A hermit like me, will let you know, what is written here, is always first spoken, but most of what was written, was never spoken. It was written because speaking wasn’t possible. You have had DL, but it wouldn’t let you express what you wanted to say. Everybody writes a book these days and, perhaps, someone will buy and read that book, but no one cares enough about their language to engage in EL.  

 

I am a graceful hermit, who loves himself so much, that he no longer cares about the misunderstanding which is called DL. How could anyone be satisfied with a way of talking, in which there is no room for silence? My LE speaks because my EL emerges from my stillness. While I can be and like to be very loud,  I always return to my quietness and my taciturnity.         

 I came upon a writing from some years ago, which I never posted on this blog.   

Being A Man,

 

Are you ready to hear me speak about what it is like for me to be a man? I don’t talk about becoming a man, but only about being a man. Also, I don’t talk about men, who feel uncomfortable about being a man, as I am a comfortable man. My manhood isn’t having anything to do with forcefulness, although it is definitely about strength or, rather, the power of my commitment to being who I am and how I perceive myself to be.

 

I am not into change and yet I am new every moment. I am the same serious person every second of the year. I am reliable and predictable, and I am able to laugh and express my unique way of life. You don’t have to believe me, admire me or fear me. I am not into convincing you, leading you, making you feel inferior, demanding your attention or frightening you. My manhood is pure and gentle, and your money doesn't mean anything to me. Most people will never sense who I am as a man, as I hardly ever speak about it.

 

It has often been a waste of time to speak about my manhood, as my view of what it is like to be a man isn’t recognized, respected or understood. In spite of all that, I am very proud and certain and while I write this, I have no dreams about changing people their opinions. My opinion matters a great deal to me and that is the only thing that really matters.

 

I don’t seek or crave anyone’s approval and I don’t cheer on or adore anyone. Men have to live their own lives. Men may disagree with me until eternity and that’s fine with me. I am impressing and guiding myself and yet I never brag. I don’t want to, as being a man isn’t about comparing myself to others. I am only busy with myself, and I consider it to be essential for men to take themselves seriously and know exactly where they stand. Since this writing is about men, not women, I say: men need to know themselves!

 

I stand alone, go alone and can only be a friend to him, who can be alone. Being alone is my nature. I don’t care about social adjustment. I don’t tolerate anyone’s demands and everyone always finds out about that soon and leaves me alone. I like to be alone and happily speak my own truth, elaborately, even if I am the only one listening to what I am saying or the only one reading what I have written.

 

My language is simple and clear. Anyone can talk like me and be with me and understand what I say. My clarity makes other people, men and women, get clear about themselves. However, I am not busy with anyone’s doubts and uncertainties. I stay away from competition; I don’t compare myself to anyone and am nobody’s role-model. I don’t believe in such nonsense. I am well aware, there has never been a man like me, but I am truly convinced there will be many like me, as I herald the future of all mankind. I know, you believe I am a fool, but I have something, you have yet to acquire. 

 

I succeed in every task which I have set myself. My results are visible, audible, meaningful and tangible. I am satisfied with my accomplishments. Nothing of what I possess was given to me. I have worked for it and I have acquired it. I have what I have, because I deserve it. My honor is my truth. I always knew, I would have what I have today, and I don’t want anything more. I have exactly what I need, and I don’t want anything else than what I already have. My life goes by itself and my manhood, is to describe it as I experience it.     

 

Gebeuren,

 

Mijn woorden stromen vanwege mijn Belichaamde Taal (BT). Het is een prachtig, eenvoudig, moeiteloos en vanzelfsprekend gebeuren. Alles kan zijn zoals het is en er wordt niets verzonnen. Als ik dit zou zeggen, dan zou ik van de klank genieten, maar nu ik dit op mijn laptop type, hoor ik alleen de klank van mijn vingers op het toetsenbord. Het is Zondag avond en ik heb net heerlijk gegeten. Ik drink een kom met camille thee en voel de warme gloed in mijn lijf.

 

Ik ga net zo lang verder met schrijven, totdat ik er genoeg van heb. Op dit moment ben ik nog aan het bepalen waar ik het over wil hebben. Eigenlijk weet ik het al, want ik laat gewoon komen wat komt. Toch weet ik niet precies wat er gaat komen en dat is juist waarom BT mij zo boeit. Ik verveel me nooit met mijn eigen taal, die mij zo gelukkig maakt. Vandaag was het heerlijk zacht weer en ik heb met Bonnie in de tuin gezeten. Morgen is de weersvoorspelling ook goed en ga ik al de gevallen bladeren opruimen.  

 

Er zijn tal van zaken, waarover ik zou kunnen schrijven, maar ik heb daar geen zin in en dus wacht ik, totdat mijn handen gaan bewegen. Ik schrijf dus niet omdat ik iets denk, maar omdat ik mijn handen laat gaan op dat toetsenboord. Er is geen taal in mij en het is zo heerlijk, om dat keer op keer te zeggen en te schrijven. Het bewijs van wat ik zeg, staat pal voor mijn neus op het beeldscherm. Ik vind het echt zo idioot, dat vrijwel niemand met mij hierover wil spreken, omdat iedereen toch zou moeten weten, hoe enorm  belangrijk dit is. De realizatie, dat er geen innerlijke taal bestaat, betekent dat wij dus niet denken, maar enkel schrijven of praten en dus niet fantaseren, klagen, opscheppen of obsessievelijk bezig zijn met het zogenaamde mentale gebeuren in ons hoofd.

 

Op mijn blog heeft mijn schrijven een bepaalde vorm. Het hele gebeuren bestaat meestal uit zeven paragraven of zelfs meer. Ik hou er gewoon van om heel uitvoerig te zijn en minutieus. Op die manier kan alles worden benoemd en geplaatst, omdat ik het laat gebeuren. Ofschoon ik weet, dat er slechts een ander persoon is, die doet, wat ik doe, vind ik, dat iedereen dit zou kunnen doen en hiermee zijn of haar voordeel kan doen. In BT eigenen wij onze taal toe en is ons leven een totaal ander gebeuren.

 

In onze gebruikelijke, onbewuste, moeizame en onnatuurlijke Ontlichaamde Taal (OT) gebeuren vreemde dingen. Wij beschouwen echter de chaos, de vervreemding, de frustratie en de zinloosheid van OT als normal, omdat wij het verschil nog niet hebben herkend en erkend met voortgaande BT. Het herkennen, onderscheiden of identificeren van OT en BT, is een fascinerend gebeuren, dat plaats kan vinden vanwege ons luisteren naar onszelf, terwijl wij spreken. Het erkennen van OT en BT is even zo belangrijk, omdat het hier gaat om het accepteren, aanvaarden, toegeven, onderkennen of inzien van het gigantische verschil tussen deze twee wijzes van omgang met taal. Wanneer dit verschil voor het eerst word benoemd en als een nieuwe ervaring kan gebeuren, dan beseffen wij, dat wij altijd onvrijwillig hebben deelgenomen aan OT en dat wij eigenlijk BT willen hebben, maar niet weten hoe of dat gaat.

 

Iedereen vraagt zichzelf wel eens, op een bepaald moment, af: waarom gebeuren de dingen en hoe gebeuren dingen? De vraag verrijst, omdat wij er schijnbaar nog geen aandacht aan hebben gegeven. De vraag blijft echter onbeantwoord, zolang als wij ongemerkt, met OT een voorgeschreven antwoord hebben, vanuit onze opvoeding, geloof of cultuur. Ons eigen antwoord kan alleen worden gevonden met BT. En, wanneer wij dan dat antwoord hebben gegeven, dan lossen de vragen, die wij hadden, op.

 

Nadat je je OT hebt stopgezet en je verder bent blijven gaan met je BT, dan zal het uiteraard gaan gebeuren, dat je je helemaal vervuld, tevreden en vol met energie voelt. Je bent eigenlijk, van meet af aan, met BT je Taal Verlichting (TV) aan het zeggen en schrijven. Natuurlijk gaat al je schrijven over het praten met jezelf, over je BT en je TV maakt zich dus kenbaar in wat jij over jezelf hoort en leest. Alles is simpel en helder. Er bestaat geen enkele behoefte om het mooier te maken dan het is, want jou BT is op zichzelf – zoals heel vaak wordt gezegd – te mooi om waar te zijn. Je kan en hoeft het niet te geloven, want het is een gebeuren, dat geheel vanzelf gaat.

 

Met je gebruikelijke, alledaagse wijze van spreken, die – of je het nou wil toegeven of niet – OT is, zal het nooit kunnen gebeuren, dat je een zelf-kennis opdoet, die effectief is. Je blijft met je OT allerlei gedragingen voortzetten, die je eigenlijk niet wil, maar waar je niet mee op kunt houden, omdat je je OT nog nooit een halt hebt toegeroepen. Het is voor mij niet zo verwonderlijk, dat mensen in democratische landen, in de naam van de vrijheid, allerlei veranderingen in hun OT tolereren, die  hun eigen belang beslist niet ondersteund, terwijl de taal van het individu - BT - nergens te horen is. Met het stopzetten van je OT, vindt er eveneens, gaandeweg, een stopzetten plaats van alle gedragingen, die door je OT werden veroorzaakt en in stand gehouden.

 

Ook al zal het keer op keer blijven gebeuren, dat je weer terugvalt in je conditionering met OT, als je   blijft experimenteren en toch weer verder gaat met je BT, dan gaat het – door eenvoudigweg met jezelf te praten en naar jezelf te luisteren – gebeuren, dat je TV het roer in handen neemt. In het begin van je ontdekkingsreis met BT is er nog een besef, dat jij of OT of BT doet, maar er is eigenlijk niemand, die OT of BT doet, want beiden gebeuren gewoon vanwege je omstandigheden. Het idee, dat jij het doet, neemt af met de voortgang van je BT en je TV laat je weten dat jij als identiteit ben opgeheven. Jij bestond niet als de entiteit, die jij geloofde te zijn en je begrijpt ineens, dat alles wat je zei, hoorde, schreef of las, van OT afkomstig was. Eindelijk bepaal jij met jou BT wie jij werkelijk bent en wie jij altijd bent geweest.          

 

 

Return,

 

Although I do read back what I have written – to catch any mistakes – I don’t feel any urge to return to what I have already written. I rather continue to say or write something new or prefer to remain without any language. Usually, we talk about not saying something, as being quiet, but my not saying anything is more or actually less than that, because I don’t entertain the illusion, I can have some private speech, some inner self talk or some thoughts.

 

I always have something enjoyable and revealing to return to, that is why I talk alone with myself and listen to the sound of my voice and can feel this wonderful sense of peace, which can only come when one engages in Embodied Language (EL). I know very well, that talking out loud with yourself, is considered to be a symptom of madness, but for me, it signifies my sanity and my intelligence. The quietness involved in talking with myself, is possible, because there is no language going on inside of me.

 

I don’t participate in Disembodied Language (DL), the way of dealing with language, in which we still get carried away by the idea, that we have a mind, or words and sentences inside our head. I like to go on with EL, because it allows me to say what I want to say, which is not what I have already said. EL is a return on the same path, I have gone with DL. Yes, like everyone else, I too unconsciously continued with DL for a long time, but I am recovering with EL.

 

Naturally, there is only a need, to say what I want to say, to the extent I haven’t said it. Once I have said what I wanted to say, I have said it, I have heard it and, ideally, I have understood and acted on it. With my EL, I direct and evaluate, which behavior needs to stop and which behavior has to be increased or decreased. If I do this optimally, skillfully, repeatedly and consciously, the results of my actions are good and I can confidently continue with my behavior, as there is no unattended business to return to. 

 

As I began to have less and less DL, but more and more EL, it became less and less needed for me to return to my EL, because my EL began to effortlessly express my Language Enlightenment (EL). Now that I have taken care of my own needs, I’m more than ever aware about the irrefutable sad fact, that most people live dissatisfied, meaningless, shallow lives, because they, unknowingly, engage in DL every day. They cannot live a peaceful, productive, happy life like me, with their unconscious way of dealing with language. It is on their behalf, that I continue to talk and write about the difference – which I already know – between our DL and EL. To my knowledge, nobody knows anything about this topic like I do.

 

Once you have identified and explored – by talking out loud with yourself and by listening to the sound of your voice – the immense difference between your DL and EL, you could never return anymore to who you used to be with only DL. Not too long ago, I still felt compelled to write and speak about what I have come to know, but this is no longer the case. I continue to write like this, because there might be someone, who catches on, who starts to speak with and listen to him or herself and who notices that everything I have said and written is equally true for anyone who sincerely tries it out. My dear Dutch friend AnnaMieke is such a courageous person. Please, go and read her wonderful blog and say for yourself, how her marvelous EL has affected her life. Here is the link to her blog: Vertaalde Shoonheid. (klompanna.blogspot.com)

 

You are experiencing all kinds of problems, because of how you deal with your language. Your troubles will only come to an end if you pay attention to how you deal with language. Language is a door through which you have left yourself. The only way, to return to yourself, is to go through that door again. You will return the way you came, by describing, to yourself, with your EL, how your DL has led you astray. Your return will be such victory, such a home coming.

 

Everything turns back to normal, when you return again to the way of talking in which you speak with a natural voice, which sounds and feels so good. You come out of all your fantasies, superstitions and illusions. When you say to yourself, there is really no language inside of you, energy begins to return to you, which was drained by this false notion, that you have thoughts or a mind. It happens, because it is true, there are absolutely no words inside of you.   

 

When I, some forty-five years ago, for the first time, started to explore my own EL, I still couldn’t believe it was possible. Although I have doubted it, I never gave up on it and I kept being amazed, about my own growing ability, to return to it and stay with it. Now, at age sixty-five, I live my life, which is full of EL and, consequently, a celebration of my LE. To me, it makes no difference, whether you experiment and find out about your EL or not, but if you do, I will rejoice in your success. If you go seriously on this return-journey, if you take the steps I suggest in my writings, my videos and songs, you will acquire your EL and then we will be able to enjoy our LE together. Please check out my You Tube channel. Just type my name Maximus Peperkamp.  

 

You’ll return your life to yourself, when you become in charge of your own language. With your DL, you have been beating around the bush. You were a stupid slave to your own language, which appeared to happen to you involuntarily. Basically, your language is meaningless, as long as you are acting out your conditioning history with DL, in which you have remained busy with others, to avoid being busy with yourself. I say, it is more than time for you to finally return to who you really are, by admitting that your language and your experience didn’t and couldn’t match. Your EL is the expression of your individuality and is the only path to your freedom. I know you don’t believe me and there is only a small chance, you will return to your senses with your EL.

 

To recognize that your own mechanical, unnatural, energy-draining DL is truly a devastating experience, means that everything you have believed in is false. With your EL, you step into a new phase of your life, in which there is a lot of work to be done, because with EL, everything has a new explanation. Are you patient, sensitive, courageous, persistent enough, to hear what you have to say to yourself with your EL?

 

When you switch from DL to EL, you will return, at once, to who you really are and have always been. In effect, you will instantaneously experience your LE. It is an incredible shock, and you will need to return to this transformative experience many, many times, before you can make sense of it with your EL. Each time you return to your EL, you first have to acknowledge and stop your DL and become fully conscious about the astonishing fact, that this seemingly simple act of speaking with yourself and listening to yourself, allows you to step out of eons of time of cultural conditioning. You are alone with yourself and responsible for everything in your life.

 

On the one hand, your EL is a great relief, but on the other hand, it is an enormous challenge. Moreover, there is no way back to your DL and although you try to back out of what you have started, you can’t help but notice, DL back-fires all the time. Even by merely reading and considering these words, you have come close to your own truth, but you are fearful about the consequences of your actions, which you have yet to take, to be able to have EL.

 

Your phony, unconscious, miserable, conflicted life with DL is always inviting you back and your return to it, is going to make things worse, as you know it has to do with your own language. If, however, you manage to continue with EL, things will settle down. Perhaps, you are one of the first human beings, to experience EL and this great privilege comes with  real self-knowledge, you are going to need all the time you can get, to learn to live with this new understanding. With EL you return your power to you.       

 

Images,

 

We have all heard the stories of people, who, when they felt that they were dying, supposedly, saw their whole life, in a series of images, passing through their mind. If there is any truth to these reports – I believe they are true – they signify that, commonly, we keep imagining things until the very end. Due to our usual way of talking, we engage in Disembodied Language (DL), in which we, unconsciously, hang on to images of ourselves and of each other. Moreover, our disjointed, chaotic, conflicted lives, are based on what we call our mind, the tragic, stupid, stubborn psychological fantasy, that inevitably arose from the way of talking, in which we couldn’t be ourselves.

 

In DL, we believe, as a speaker, that the listener is someone else, but not we ourselves. Consequently, we don’t listen to ourselves while we speak, that is, we disconnect from ourselves every time we speak. We don’t have any sensitive, ongoing, immediate, sound-experience of ourselves, while we speak, therefore, we can only have an idea or an image of who we believe and claim to be. Our relationships are shallow, meaningless and troubled, because we only know how to communicate the images, we have of ourselves and the images we have of others.

 

Surely, genuine relationship is impossible as long as we can’t talk about who we really are. Obviously, we are not an image, but our DL, unknowingly, reduces us to an image of ourselves. This happens, as we never get to talk about these images, which form the content of what we call our consciousness. If we would talk about what is in our attention – and if we would put the image-maker back together with the image – we would find out many valuable things.

 

These images of ourselves and each other, are visual distractions from crucially important matters, which we should learn to speak about, so we can finally begin to listen to them. Our DL would immediately stop, because it was always based on the separation of the experiencer and the experience. Whenever we say, we have an experience, we assume, there is someone, who has this experience, but the reality is, the experiencer is also our experience. However, we will only find out about this, when we talk out loud with ourselves and listen to ourselves, and, therefore, engage in Embodied Language (EL).  

 

In EL, in which the speaker realizes, that he or she is always his or her own listener, there is no maker of images or what we call a self or a mind. This is why we are continuously new and our language can flow naturally and effortlessly. The crux of our EL is, that we are not looking or, as they say, witnessing or observing, this whole image-making business, but we are saying it and listening to it. We can only hear the sound of our voice, in the here and now and so, no time passes, between the making of the image and the image-maker. We instantly hear, there is no image-maker and, with that, the image dissolves.

 

Once we have heard, felt and experienced the great difference between our DL and our EL, our sense of reality has permanently changed. Everything isn’t put together – as we previously believed in DL – with thoughts, but with our language. Obviously, the reality we put together with DL is profoundly problematic, since we imagine language to exist inside of us, as our mind and thoughts. Of course, reality or nature doesn’t depend on our language, as it exists without it. We can only describe what is, or what is happening right now, with language that doesn’t create an image of who we are, as such an image would separate us from that living reality.

 

The images we have of ourselves and our world with DL, are incorrect and giving us nothing but trouble. It is only when we participate in ongoing EL, that we can solve the conundrum of the observer and the observed. The observer is merely an image of who we claim to be with our language, but when we say it out loud and carefully listen to it, we come out of our language illusion. Simply stated, the speaker is the listener, but that means, there is only speaking going on, but there is no speaker and there is only listening going on, but there is no listener. Also, this speaking and listening happen simultaneously, as our speaking and listening behavior are jointed.

 

Another way to approach the issue of image-making – and go get clear about the divisiveness it creates, as an individual language matter – is to talk about the supposed difference between the analyzer and the analysis. It is instantly clear in EL, the analyzer is the analyzed and there is no more possibility to get lost in fantasies about ourselves. It is laughable, but also sad, that even scientific people, psychiatrists or psychologists, don’t take the difference between DL and EL serious, while poor mental health patients – what a totally stupid concept – like all the so-called professionals, erroneously, believe they are troubled by images in their head. Getting rid of images is also a big issue in dealing with trauma, but EL shows us, unequivocally, that the entire premise is wrong.