Anonymous,

 

The word anonymous comes from Late Latin anonymus and Greek, anonymos, and it means without a name. What escapes most people’s attention, however, is that, when there is no word, to refer to who we are, as an individual, we are without language. Anonymous describes how we talk, when we engage in Disembodied Language (DL), because in DL – which is our usual way of talking – we don’t possess the language-skill, to be who we are. In DL, we, as speakers, do not listen to ourselves, while we speak, therefore, we can’t talk about our own experiences in a realistic, honest and effective manner. Only during Embodied Language (EL) can we show who we really are, as we use our language correctly, which means we listen to ourselves while we speak. In other words, in EL, what we say matters, because of how we say it.

 

While belonging to a group, we hide ourselves, we become anonymous. DL is everywhere, due to this tendency, which is rooted in our survival. Of course, anonymity – or rather our isolation – is enhanced by modern technology. On the one hand, we seek online anonymity, because we long to be in a protected environment for our so-called self-expression, but, on the other hand, we want to be able to vent our toxicity, without running the risk of getting in trouble.

 

Contrary to what most people are inclined to believe, we don’t seek anonymity consciously, but we habitually fall back into our conditioning history, in which we were taught, that listening to others and making others listen to us, is the only thing which really matters. Nobody ever told us, listening to ourselves is important. To the contrary, listening to ourselves, historically was everywhere, always, systematically punished, as it implies, that you are going against the group.

 

As long as you remain anonymous, you can create a false image of yourself, to impress others. Inevitably, those who seek anonymous online environments – to, supposedly, express themselves, to chat or to build relationships – are in for a big surprise, if they would finally actually meet with the anonymous person – who was, of course, hiding behind words – who they only had some written conversations with.

 

The reason some – probably nice people – feel socially awkward, anxious or self-conscious, in the real world and seek online environments, is because everywhere everyone engages in DL and they, unknowingly, want EL. Psychology has yet to begin to consider this irrefutable fact and the extent to which many of our ‘mental health problems’ derive from our everyday, insensitive, unnatural, inauthentic, self-defeating DL. Being anonymous makes people feel less vulnerable, but it exacerbates the problem we have never addressed: the difference between DL and EL.

 

The other side of being anonymous – online – is that it apparently facilitates a morbid need for people to feel unaccountable for their actions. As I have alluded to, previously, all the trolling and the cyberbullying are anti-social actions, which, due to anonymity, will go unpunished. However, unbeknownst to everyone, our usual, mechanical, unconscious way of talking, DL, creates sadistic people, who get a kick out of punishing others and masochistic people, who are sheepishly and slavishly doing what they are told. The oppressor and the oppressed together create and maintain each other’s anonymity, as neither one reveals who they are with their DL.

 

Only when you take time, to be by yourself and talk out loud with yourself and calmly listen to the sound of your own voice, will you no longer be anonymous. You hear a change in your voice when you shift from DL to EL. All of a sudden, you are out of your conditioning history of DL, and you feel free. Your whole being responds to this marvelous experience. You are able to say things with EL, which you couldn’t say with DL. You are truly you and saying your own name is pure extasy, as you are in touch with yourself.

 

In one way or another, we are all vulnerable, to be sucked-into online anonymity, because, as long as we keep having DL, we are contradicting ourselves, we struggle and are distracted from what is important to us, we are in conflict with ourselves, as we haven’t been able to verbally formulate our own clear sense of our identity. This only occurs, after our DL has been stopped, when we can continue with our EL and when we realize our Language Enlightenment (LE).

 

The anonymous online community in essence is no different from any other community, in that every community, culture, society is built on DL, in which speakers dominate the listeners. This process also occurs with the speaker as his or her own listener. You could say, that in DL, the 'listener' remains anonymous, as the 'speaker' is always in charge. When you begin to listen to yourself while you speak, you realize you don’t even recognize yourself, as if you speak with a total stranger. This is because you never let the so-called 'listener-in-you' speak. In your DL, the 'speaker' never seems to stop speaking, because the so-called 'listener-in-you' never tells him or her to shut up. 

There is no such thing as an inner speaker or an inner listener, but it will be effective, for someone, who has never spoken with him or herself, to admit that a so-called part of you never gets the attention because another part of you always dominates. In EL, you will give that part attention, because you will notice that it asks your attention and when you hear that part speak, you will nourish yourself and you will no longer feel divided or anonymous.