June 2, 2014

June 2, 2014

Written by Maximus Peperkamp, M.S. Verbal Behaviorist

Dear Reader, 

Because this writing is meant to be read by others than only this writer, it is important to mention that a new letter type was chosen for the month of June. The current letter type is called “forte.” It appeals to this writer for musical reasons. This writer has always loved compositions in which the music reaches some kind of beautiful climax. Music has always played a powerful role in this author’s life and it is due to his father’s love for music that he has such a great appreciation for it. There was a time when this author was addicted to the expression of strong emotions in opera music, but these days this need seems to have been fulfilled. Currently, his preference is more for calm and peaceful music. 

It is nice to use this letter type to write about how the stormy emotions from the past have finally subsided. It was always this enormous contrast which made the calm sounds sound so beautiful and it is this writer’s goal to make this available to the reader. Without this contrast we are completely lost. We need a similar contrast to be able to learn more about Sound Verbal Behavior (SVB). To know about SVB is to know about Noxious Verbal Behavior (NVB). We can only confidently go into SVB after we have thoroughly explored NVB. Since we haven’t done that, we are unable to go into SVB, even if we would like to. Most likely, our wish to go into SVB is based on our refusal to acknowledge the reality of NVB. 

It is astounding how in spite of years of successfully teaching of SVB this author still has problems attracting people to his seminars. He didn’t see an increase in popularity, but the lack of participants has never stopped him from organizing another seminar. It can be said, however, that the general response to SVB and NVB is remarkably stable. In as much as participants always feel deeply moved, inspired and enthusiastic about SVB, they just as readily forget about it and think they know it when in fact they don’t. SVB cuts through all the red tape.

There is something harsh about SVB which makes this author think again about his father. Whenever this author did something wrong as a child, his father became angry. His father, who would physically punish him for misbehaving, would insist on hearing the truth, which would always came out, usually accompanied by a flood of tears. This author knows that it is painful to differentiate between SVB and NVB, to avoid the pain that is involved in recognizing that we were often punished instead of reinforced and that the punishment we received had many problematic consequences. People would rather believe in something good. 

Our belief in something good is the biggest stand in the way for learning about SVB. Since SVB is not about our beliefs, but about our real experiences, people are easily turned off by it. There is a lot of environmental support for our beliefs, but there is very little support for our experiences, especially the  experiences which we have while we communicate. Only in SVB can we and do we recognize that our wish to understand things prevents us from experiencing it. Our understanding of SVB is based on this experience and can never be without it. The moment we think we have understood it, SVB becomes a belief, which disconnects us from our experience. We  don’t need to understand SVB, we need to experience it! Our need for understanding signifies our lack of experience. Those who claim to understand do so because of their lack of experience. There is nothing to claim when one experiences SVB. Whatever one experiences can be expressed in one's own words, pace and rhythm.  

SVB allows us to stay close to our own experience, because we speak in such a way that the speaker and the listener feel comfortable. This means that we allow our private speech to be expressed in our public speech as best as we can. This inclusion of our private speech into our public speech is not based on what we have to say to ourselves content-wise, but rather on whether we listen to ourselves. Although we may already have been expressing our feelings, we have not yet listened to them. Although we may think that we were already listening to our emotions, we haven’t really expressed hem, while we were listening to them.