Accountable,

 

I am not going to write, that everything is going to be all right, if you just do as I say. This is not how Embodied Language (EL) works. Besides, it is your life, which is in trouble, not mine. My life is fine and I am sure, it will continue to be, while you, most likely, will go on to live your vacuous, phony, pretentious life. I say this, because my life is rich, meaningful, and enjoyable.

 

I can hear and see that you do not have what I have. You do not want to know what I say or write, as my EL disrespects your illusions and falsehoods. I admit, I do not find anything respectable about your Disembodied Language (DL). You may believe, it is because of you, that you do not talk with me, but I abhor your way of talking so much, that I make sure, you stay away from me. I do not care about your DL, as I do not want it. Go and have your DL with those you can impress.

 

I am not your leader and certainly not your cheer-leader. I have no affiliation with anyone or anything, except with EL. I should say, except with my own EL, as you, if you ever get to it, will not affiliate with my EL, but with your own EL. Yes, EL requires total withdraw from the senseless conflict, which is inherent in your normal, accepted, every-day conversation. The fact that you cannot even admit the truth, that your interaction is an endless, exhausting struggle for attention, shows how powerless, ignorant, and superficial you are.  

 

I am in charge of my own life and I could only live as I do, because my language is the most important to me. However, you are careless about your language, as you believe there is nothing wrong with you. I continue to tell you, your DL is a waste of time and energy, as you cannot be happy without EL. I only write about my EL here, because I probably will never get to talk with you. Therefore, this writing is for me and not for you, as I can still state these truths for my own benefit. Everyone else is getting attention with more of the same DL and I am simply not part of it. I cannot get your attention with my EL, so I write in mock-DL to let you know, I know what DL is. Moreover, I hold you accountable for your stupid DL. The fact, that we do not engage in EL, is because nobody is even capable of holding anyone responsible for the consequences of their ugly DL.  

 

It is amazing, but also harsh, to tell the truth about EL, but this is my truth for you. I have studied psychology for many years, I have worked in mental health for many years and I have taught psychology at Butte College for many years. Even before that, I have given hundreds of seminars, presentations, workshops, and individual sessions, to let people know what I know about EL. There are thousands of people, who have heard, read, or experienced EL, who have felt what it is like, who have said that it is great, that it will change the world, that I should write a book, who have listened to themselves while they speak, who have become aware about the great importance of open communication, the missing frequency or the language that creates space, but, except only one or two, they have all left EL again. 

 

EL is rare, as there is nobody to remind us that it is possible. We go on with our religion, politics, science, or education, but we forget about EL and we engage in DL, by default. It is not my fault or my failure, that basically everyone who heard about EL from me, did not continue with it. To the contrary, I was successful, as I gave everyone an unforgettable taste, but they wasted it, as they did not have the courage to go on with EL on their own. Everyone with DL is coward. One can only go on with EL, if one can accept, that one is alone with oneself and talk and write about what that is like.

 

It is exquisite to hear or read about our own Language Enlightenment (LE). Presumably, we are all unique, but, apparently, we are not special enough to ourselves, that we can allow our LE to be expressed. In DL, we  make a big deal about ourselves, as we feel inferior and so, we claim to be superior. In EL, however, we are natural and simple and our own words are the proof in the pudding. People say, actions speak louder than words, but that is reasoned from DL. In EL, our words show, we can say what we want to say, in our own way.           

 Lost,

What do you have to lose? It is of course who you have always believed to be.

In Embodied Language (EL), you speak in a way that never repeats itself.

You will also write that you cannot be or remain yourself.

It really is that nothing remains of how you were, because you are new to your language.

Your language goes its own way and that is your freedom.

Constantly dropping what you have said or written is a huge relief.

EL is all yours, but you can only move forward with it, if you surrender to what you really want to say.

EL is the language that creates space, because it expresses your true nature.

There is no other way to express your Language Enlightenment (LE) than with the words you already have. 

You can only continue with your EL, if you speak and write about your LE.

 

Blossom,

 

I want everyone who reads this, to take my words dead-serious. I have not written any book and I will never write any book. What you happen to read here, you cannot read anywhere else. If you read this, you have found me. If you really consider what I am writing about, you have to acknowledge, that it is no coincidence, that you have stumbled on my words.

 

My objective with this writing, is to invite you, to have Embodied Language (EL) with me. I only care about those who are brave enough to do so. If you read on, but doubt, if you will talk with me, you might as well stop reading, as your fearful doubt always predicts, you will continue your usual, superficial Disembodied Language (DL). I am more important than any famous author or scholar, as I have the key, that can unlock your potential, which, due to your DL, was unable to blossom.

 

My insistence on my importance, is not in any way exaggerated, as what I write in this blog and would talk with you about, if you had the guts to contact me, is absolutely true. I know, that my words may make you feel offended, because I am certain about what I say. You just cannot stand someone, who not only lets you know what you do not know, but who is also incredibly upfront about it. Your resistance to what I convey, is part of your DL, which gives you nothing but trouble, although you believe it to be who you are. You are not what you believe to be, due to your usual, phony, and nasty way of talking.

 

Regardless of what you supposedly have achieved in your life, you did not blossom. Your forceful DL does not impress me, as I have heard it, read it, and felt it, all before. The only thing which satisfies me is to engage in EL. I will continue to blossom, in my EL, even if you are too much of a coward, to talk and have EL with me. Your DL, like everybody’s DL, is absolutely disgusting, unintelligent, and false. I have no good words for it and I admit, I engage in DL myself, when I mention this to you or to anyone else. However, I do so deliberately, but you always do it unconsciously, reflexively, habitually. Moreover, I can easily do so, as I do not have to pretend, that I have EL, like you do.  

 

Certainly, it is a great tragedy, every human being is in the same predicament, as we all, unknowingly, engage mainly in DL. When we would finally get our priorities right, we would pay close attention to rare individuals like myself, who know how to maintain ongoing EL, because they are able to recognize the difference between DL and EL. These unique human beings let you know, there is nothing unique about your mechanical DL. Your uniqueness is obliterated by your usual way of dealing with language, which is conditioned by how others have talked with you. EL really makes you blossom, as it is about how you talk with yourself and how you are then able to talk with others, after you have talked with yourself.

 

In essence, in EL, there is no other. The so-called other is your belief, your perception, your memory, and your experience of who they are. Thus, in EL you always talk with yourself. You blossom, as you inevitably become aware about your nature, which is your Language Enlightenment (LE). What is the value of your so-called freedom of speech, if you do not even acknowledge the difference between your own DL and EL? Even in the name of freedom, you kept having more of the same, old, destructive DL.

 

The promise of EL is that you will blossom, that you will comfortably and confidently come into your own and that it will be clear and self-evident, who you are and have always been. LE is the ultimate unfolding of your psychological development and new, profound, joyful experiences keep occurring. I condemn your DL, but I do not put you down, as the time has come for you to blossom. I like to repeat that word, as your flowering has not yet happened and can never happen, if you keep busy with DL. To stop your DL, is a necessary preparation for your EL.  

 

As long as you still engage in DL, you are complicit in everything that is wrong. I do not care about your religion, your politics, your gender, your status, your culture, your ethnicity, your fame, your education, or your career, as none of these have ever resulted in EL, the way of talking in which we agree, that DL is tragic, stupid, disgusting, and horrific. You may not know that you engage in DL, every day, but I do. If you read these words out loud and listen to the sound of your own voice, I hope you will investigate, why do I say what I say, why do I write what I write?

 

I am not, like everyone else, giving you my opinion, but I share what you cannot hear or read anywhere else, as no one knows this. That I came to know the immense difference between our DL and EL is easily ignored. This used to matter a great deal to me, but it does not matter anymore, whether you explore what I say or not, because you will always be faced with the consequences of your refusal to consider what I say or of any other action or inaction. Even right now, whether you know it or not, accept it or not, or are aware of it or not, you experience these consequences. It could not be otherwise. Since you do not want to have any EL with me, I conclude, you must be having DL and wanting to continue with it.

 

It is as clear as day, you are part of the problem, as long as you justify your usual coercive way of talking as necessary, rational, smart, or sensible. What you and everyone else accept as our normal way of talking is a disaster, as we approve of, participate in and claim to be proud of violence. Yes, you read this correctly, also your DL is aggressive, ruthless, and arrogant. I am not going to do what you expect anyone to do, who talks with you. I am not praising you, accepting you, kissing your ass or allowing you to dominate me. As long as you have DL, you want to dominate me or others. I do not like it, I do not want it and let you know, with these words, you are not creating anything good in your life. Moreover, you support, enable, and believe in the falsehoods you keep spouting. You live in your illusion, but I can hear, see, and feel, you are angry, unfulfilled, demanding and stressed out. There is nothing about you, that makes me want to be with you, since your DL has made you insensitive for who you are and unconscious about the other way of talking, which I represent. Your EL is about nothing you expected.

 

Once you engage in EL, you will be saying these words, not because I made you say these words, but because you too can experience that EL has nothing to do with what you are used to. Let’s face it, you have only heard and read DL and it is to be expected that you interpret everything from your lengthy history of conditioning with DL. However, if you manage, even only a few moments, to engage in EL, you will joyfully, whole-heartedly and with a great sense of relief admit, that you speak in a new way. Yes, you will be rejuvenated and renewed by EL and the fact, that you are depressed, anxious, stressed, frustrated, scattered, and drained is the inevitable consequence of your almost permanent involvement in DL. I write ‘almost’, because there are still a few, brief, fleeing moments, in which even a person, as unhappy, confused, and conflicted as you, still can have a small glimpse of EL. After all, in EL you inadvertently express your natural wellbeing.

 

It was a long text, so you could dig deeper and get into what I am talking about. By reading this text out loud, you hear EL in the sound of your voice. If you would write about your response, you would like it so much, that you can continue writing (like I do), as your words keep coming and revealing the truth of your life. In EL, you talk with yourself. Your language is not happening to you, as if you cannot seem to be able to control the noise and chaos of your restless, troubled, so-called mind. In EL, there is no mind, as you know, there is only how you deal with your language. Due to your DL, you had never even considered how you dealt with your language.

 

Nothing great is created suddenly, any more than a bunch of grapes or a fig. If you tell me that you desire a fig. I answer you that there must be time. Let it first blossom, then bear fruit, then ripen.

     Epictetus

 

Mine,

 

These words are mine, because I enjoy speaking them and writing them. It has nothing to do with possessing, but with receiving. I do not just grab them or force them, but I find them, like a treasure. I want to protect them from harm. These words are like my children and I raise them as best as I can. I feel so fortunate, I did not have children, but got these wonderful words instead. I never knew, I had so many words to describe my wellbeing.  

 

People talk a lot about their so-called happiness, but I do not hear it. They also laugh, but I do not find it funny. They sound unhappy and that is why they speak or write so emphatically about their, supposedly, special life. My life is ordinary. Nobody wants what I want and that is why my words do not compete with anyone for anything. These words are peaceful, as they have no goal, yet, they articulate precisely why I can be free and fresh. I know these words, but they are still new to me and I have no idea what they are going to tell me today. That is why I listen very closely and write with patience, so that I can hear and read and understand what it is.

 

It takes courage, to admit that our words did not work for us, but I happen to have that ability. I have fully acknowledged and understood, that my Disembodied Language (DL) was my biggest problem. Now that I have stopped my DL, I can have Embodied Language (EL) and talk and write, that everyone, except me, is stuck with their DL. I state this with authority, as I know what I am talking about. I have become an expert on something, nobody is as clear about as I am, because this ongoing EL is the only way in which my Language Enlightenment (LE) could be verbalized. The verbalization of our natural way of being is of utmost importance, yet, nobody seems to realize this. Lack of courage can only be overcome, if we take the jump and start speaking out loud with and writing to ourselves.

Regardless of how much we seem to dread this, we can still do it anyway and discover, it is not as bad we believe it to be, to talk with ourselves and to be alone with our own language. What is the big deal? Why do we fear talking with ourselves? Why do we not spend more time with our own words, writing to ourselves about what is going on in our own lives and informing ourselves about the meaning of our own experiences? If we resist doing this, it tells us, right away, that speaking and writing to ourselves contains a lot of information, we have turned our backs on. We do not want to talk with ourselves, as talking with others, supposedly, is more important than talking with ourselves. Almost immediately, it is clear to us, that there is a great taboo on using our own language just for ourselves.

 

Justification for our refusal to talk with ourselves or to write about how we would like to live, is that we are, presumably, social and, therefore, we must talk with each other, but how social can we really be, if we do not dare to speak with ourselves, to feel and allow what matters to us? Therefore, in DL, we remain anti-social, as we fail to accept and find out, who we are, as individuals. We only pretend to be social during DL. We fake it, because we hold back on who we are, if we cannot say or write what we would like to say or write. The only way to have EL instead of DL, is if we start talking with or writing to ourselves. Yes, there is only one way in which we are ever going to find out, that we are, in fact, in DL, constantly lying. In EL, we speak with ourselves and admit, that we never talk with others in the way, we like to and want to talk with ourselves.

 

Our ability to identify our own DL and EL depends not on talking with others, but on our own willingness to spend time alone, speaking with ourselves, writing to ourselves, about what we would say, if we could say what we had wanted to say. In conclusion, our lack of courage, fear, defensiveness, ignorance or belief in whatever prevents us from talking with ourselves or letting ourselves know about what is important to us, is a cop-out, an excuse to avoid being responsible for ourselves and to demand, with our DL, that others must do for us what we presumably cannot do for ourselves.                     

 

Reinterpretation,

 

Although we can only get to our own Embodied Language (EL), by speaking out loud with ourselves and by listening to and enjoying to hear the sound of our voice and by writing about what it means, to be in touch with our own language, it is absolutely fantastic to hear the EL of others or to read their writings about it. This is, of course, because, other than those, who voluntarily explore their own EL, nobody has ever spoken or written about EL, in the way that one is bound to speak or write, when one has stopped one’s own Disembodied Language (DL).

 

Once we have determined the difference between our own DL and EL, we are faced with the enormous challenge, to reinterpret everything we and others have said or written, due to our almost permanent involvement in DL. However, we can only undertake this gigantic task, once we are able to have ongoing EL. It is truly phenomenal what language each of us is able to produce, when we have been victorious in stopping our own DL and can continue with our EL, which will reveal to us our Language Enlightenment (LE).  

 

It cannot be said or written often enough, that our LE includes all of the wisdom that has ever existed! This is what Carl Jung attempted to, but ultimately, failed to address. He spoke and wrote about the “collective unconsciousness” and “the objective psyche”, the idea that “a segment of the deepest unconscious mind” is “genetically inherited” and “not shaped by personal experience.” As anyone who has explored  their own EL would know, our LE is always grounded in our personal experience and could never have revealed itself to us, if our language wasn’t adjusted to it. 

 

In EL, we are not trying to invent new terms, to be able to describe our experiences, but we will reinterpret any existing terminology, to clarify the difference between our DL and our EL, which has existed since we became verbal and acquired language. Anyone, interested in the results of ongoing EL, in speaking and writing, would find, that the formulation of our personal experience is dramatically different in DL or in EL. Simply stated, in DL, our opinion, our belief or our judgement controls the conversation, but in EL, our verbal output transcends our usual tendency to argue, disagree, force, defend, distract or reject. Moreover, during EL, we speak or write effortlessly about our own experiences, since we are not in any way preoccupied with the listener, who is not the speaker or the reader, who is not the writer.

 

In EL, the speaker and the listener, as well as the writer and the reader are one. Stated differently, in EL, our objectivity doesn’t require the rejection of our subjective experiences. To the contrary, in EL, our objectivity embraces and celebrates our subjectivity. Obviously, the exclusion of our deepest, supposedly, unconscious experiences, is what Jung refers to as the “Collective Unconscious” (CU). Not coincidentally, everyone, in DL, unknowingly, excludes their own experiences. Jung didn’t define the CU as what people couldn’t verbally express - due to their DL, which is their common way of talking - and, thus, couldn’t be conscious about. He considered the CU as "derived from ancestral memory" which presumably, is "common to all humankind" but "distinct from the individual's unconscious."  

 

Jung saw the CU as common to all human beings. By assuming this biological origin, he hoped to ground his theory in science, but as anyone who is familiar with Jung’s work must admit, in scientific circles CU is still considered as a pseudo-scientific theory. Also, it is interesting to take note of the fact, that Freud, of whom Jung was once a student, believed that the "unconscious mind" with all its "defense mechanisms", was the product of personal experience, while Jung maintained that the unconscious was "inherited from the collective experience of all humanity".

 

From this brief overview of the difference between Jung and Freud’s notion of the unconscious, anyone can understand, it was Freud, with his “free association”, who was reasoning in the direction of EL. Someone who had been thoroughly psycho-analyzed – by laying and relaxing on the couch and by talking out loud with him or herself about whatever came to his or her attention – would have eventually listened to him or herself and naturally engaged in EL and, thus, solved the conflict between what Freud called the "pleasure principle" and the "reality principle". These two principles, of course, always go hand in hand, with the way in which anyone talks with him or herself or with others.

 

Another inevitable conclusion is, that Jung’s theory of "archetypes", which later became the foundation for "personality psychology", is definitely a much bigger stand-in-the-way to EL than Freud’s theory of the unconscious. The from Jung's archetypes extrapolated "Trait-Psychology (TP)", is based on three criteria: traits must be consistent, stable and vary from person to person. In effect, TP is always only about our personal differences. This emphasis on individual personality characteristics is more in line with DL. However, Freud insisted, that each individual experiences the struggle between "Id" and the "Superego" – which anyone with EL is able to view as the dilemma between acting according to what we want as individuals (=Id) or behaving according to what is expected from us from the group we belong to (=Superego). A person with a strong "Ego", could solve the conflict between Id and Superego, as he or she would engage in EL (rather than in DL), as only he or she knows how to step out of the conditioning history of ancient group behavior and continue with individual behavior. Thus, objectively speaking, in EL, we each create our own reality.          

 

Faith,

 

Let me ask you something. When was the last time, you said what you meant to say, what you wanted others to hear and know, when you stood your ground and took a risk to defend your point of view? When you do that, you have people, who hate you for your passion, but there are also some, who love you for your belief. However, for the most part, we don’t speak our so-called mind, we don’t talk genuinely, as we don’t want to get ourselves in trouble.

 

Why is speaking the truth, saying our own truth, such a huge problem? I know why. Whenever we make our claims about what we believe, we engage in what I call Disembodied Language (DL), that is, we try to win the argument we have with others, who also, like us, try to dominate the conversation with their opinions and convictions. In Embodied Language (EL), on the other hand, we aren’t arguing with each other, as we are not speaking anymore to outdo each other.

 

EL is an effortless, natural, peaceful, beautiful, and intelligent process, in which we sincerely say what is going on with us. Surely, there may still be, due to our dreadful history with DL, some things we say and believe that are not true, but as we talk more, with ourselves and with each other, these left-overs are dissolved, as they have been accurately addressed.

 

In EL, we don’t push back on claims which are made by others, as we speak from our own relaxed way of being. In DL, by contrast, we can’t be relaxed, as the difference of opinion, is the reason we are stressed,  argumentative, upset, fearful and defensive. In EL, we don’t have any disagreements, struggles or conflicts at all. Although it is, at first, almost unbelievable, that this is possible, when we explore our EL alone, by talking out loud with ourselves, we find out, rather quickly, that it is not only possible, but also necessary.

 

When we get to talk with someone, who has also explored EL alone – by talking out loud with her or himself, by listening to the sound of her or his voice and by acknowledging, that our DL is destructive, stupid, and harmful – we realize that a different way of life is ahead of us, in which we transcend the brutality, ignorance, and meaninglessness of the tragic lives we have lived, due to our DL. Moreover, our freedom to express our own EL, never gets us in trouble. To get clear on that point is revolutionary.

 

When you discover your EL, you are at a point of no return. You begin to change and shed everything you have accumulated and weighed yourself down with, due to your DL. Undoubtedly, this is a drastic process, as you stop doing many of the things you have been doing for a long time. There is no shame or hesitation in your clear understanding, that you must abandon everything which belonged to DL.

 

Even if remnants of DL, occasionally, still emerge, as they are triggered by the circumstances you are in, you can recognize them and feel confident, they will no longer bother you, the next time you happen to be in the same circumstance. Most likely, these difficult circumstances do not even anymore occur, as you have become capable of avoiding them altogether. Your EL keeps you safe in ways you have never been able to experience with DL. Actually, DL  always provided you with a false sense of security.

 

As I have often stated, EL is the expression of your Language Enlightenment (LE). Your understanding  of your LE depends on your EL, but with DL, you are oblivious about your self-evident self-nature. In DL, your life-energy is drained out of you by opposing forces, which aren’t, as many have tried to believe, complementary, but which literally tear you apart. In EL, we are one with what we say and how we say it and this congruence endures the rest of your life.

 

EL shows you that your LE is permanent. There is no such thing, as having only a few moments of EL and you go back again to DL. You may not immediately realize this, but it is inevitable, in your ongoing EL, that you will find out, it is profoundly troubling to go back and forth between DL and EL. Thus, after you have acknowledged the agonizing difference between your DL and your EL, you can only go on with EL, as you have been initiated by your own LE. Although you still experience some effects of your conditioning history with DL, these miserable events are preventable and you rejoice in each opportunity to do so. Your LE sets the stage for the prolongation of your EL and your faith in being yourself is total, as you reap the wonderful results of your EL every day.       

 

Million,

 

Of course, I would very much like to talk with you about Embodied Language (EL) and let you know, that you can have it too, but since you don’t give me any chance to do that, I rather write about it. In this way, EL stays and continues with me and you can read about it and still get an idea of what it is.

 

If you believe that what I have written makes any sense, you can’t help but imagine what it would be like to talk with me. Actually, if this writing doesn’t make you want to have EL, there is really no hope for you, as you are doomed to remain trapped in Disembodied Language (DL) for the rest of your life.  

 

Only you can safe yourself from your DL, I cannot do it. If you don’t see your DL as a problem, you are in denial, you want to argue about what you believe to be true, but, the reality is that you only know how to engage in DL. When you talk with me you find how wonderful it is to have EL. The strange thing is, however, you may want it, but, you can’t have it.

 

You may ask me a couple of questions about how it works. Although what I say about EL is always true, my answers never make anything more clear to you. I can answer all your questions about EL and DL, but you have to ask them to yourself and engage, out loud, alone, in a conversation with yourself, before you will be able to have ongoing EL in your life.

 

You still have to give your own answer to your own question. Most likely, you will ask a question, which is not even your own question and, therefore, you end up with an answer, which isn’t yours either. For instance, you may ask: how does EL work? It sounds like a legitimate question, yet it isn’t your question.

 

Everybody asks the same question about EL, before they ask this question to themselves. Usually, they never even get that far. However, the latter would only be your question, if you would talk out loud with yourself and listen to your own voice. Unless you can hear and fully acknowledge, while you ask that question, the attention-demanding sound in your own voice, your answer will be totally useless.

 

You have been quick, superficial, and superstitious, in giving answers to any of your own questions, that is why none of your so-called answers, your jumping to conclusions, has ever worked for you, since you have always, unknowingly, continued with your DL. You only know how to pretend to have EL, but you never admitted this and stopped your own DL.

 

To put it squarely, in DL your questions as well as your answers are bogus. Who you believe to be is more important to you, than who you really are, so you keep playing hide and seek with questions and answers, but you never get around to asking the real questions, your questions, let alone, to giving your own answers, based on your own intelligence.

 

Only once or twice, due to the never-ending tragedy of your chaotic, restless, meaningless life, did you succeed in really asking yourself what is going on with you. Why are you so stressed, fearful, bored, confused, fanatic, frustrated, fake and addicted to all kinds of stuff that you know isn’t good for you or your relationships? There is this immanent gloom, as you have asked yourself that question a million times and you just can’t stand hearing the same old, unresolved, inaccurately-described problems.

 

Even if you would dare to ask yourself the difficult questions, even if you had the ability to accept your ignorance, you would still not hear it, trust it or act on it, as you have a history of failing to answer your own questions and this history is covered up by your spirituality, education, politics, and economics.

 

In DL, you unconsciously require others to conform to your belief of what is true, so you never have to ask yourself, why you are doing that? Why are you so eager to have others tell you how wonderful and fantastic you are, when, in fact, you don’t feel that way about yourself at all? If you would be able to have EL, you would feel so good about yourself, not because of how others treat you, but because of how you treat yourself, with your own language.

 

If others are, so to speak, the answer to all your questions, you believe you feel good about yourself, but anyone with EL knows, you are engaging in DL and incapable of being yourself. It doesn’t matter how nice, comforting, and subservient everyone is, who you are able to dominate with your DL. It also doesn’t matter how much you admire and kiss ass to those you look up to as your role-model. You never have EL with anyone, you treat as inferior or superior. As long as you have DL, your language simply isn’t working for you, as you are always, in one way or another, struggling, busy with others, and anxiously hanging on to your so-called identity, which is your verbal description of what you believe and tell everyone and yourself to be your reality.