Understanding,

 

When are we going to experience the immense difference between our Disembodied Language (DL) and our Embodied Language (EL)? As long as we still try to understand this difference, we don’t allow our experience of this difference.

 

The whole issue of understanding, is, due to our involvement in Disembodied Language (DL), something that is completely misunderstood.  

 

When someone is saying something, we seem to have problems understanding what he or she is saying, because he or she engages in DL and is not connecting with what he or she is saying.

 

In EL, there is never – absolutely never – any problem understanding any speaker. How can that be? In EL, the speaker is listening to him or herself while he or she speaks. Because of this, he or she is connecting with what he or she is saying.

 

The DL-listener, who proclaims, that he or she is not understanding the EL-speaker, is, of course, also not connecting with this speaker, as he or she, is him or herself not used to connecting with his or her own spoken words.

 

Connecting with what we ourselves say or with what someone else is saying, is not a matter of understanding ourselves or of understanding someone else, who speaks with us.

 

Connecting with ourselves precedes our ability to connect with others – that is, if we do not connect with ourselves, we cannot connect with others – and connecting with each other, paves the way for understanding each other.   

 

Without connecting with ourselves or with each other – as we always do in DL – we never really understand each other, although we pretend, we do, and act, as if we understand each other.   

 

We keep having so many problems with each other, because we don’t connect with ourselves or with each other, but we are good, at acting, as if everything is fine, when, in reality, it is not.

 

As stated, we cannot connect with each other before we connect with ourselves. Likewise, we cannot understand each other, before we can understand ourselves.

 

Everyone – in DL – keeps trying to understand others, which prevents them from connecting with and understanding themselves.

 

Oddly, when finally – due to our experience of our ongoing EL – we stay easily connected with ourselves, understanding follows effortlessly. Moreover, since our EL unequivocally shows us, there never was or is any language inside of us, there is, in fact, nothing to understand in EL.   

 

The so-called understanding, which we were referring to during DL, was always a reference to a nonexistent, by-our-DL-imagined, verbal, inner process. In EL, by contrast, there is no need for understanding, as we know, that there really never was or is any inner language.

 

In EL, the speaker is always in touch with him or herself, and, therefore, he or she is immediately connecting with the listener, who can feel, that there is really nothing to be understood, but there is only something to be experienced.  

 

The boring, demanding, stressful emphasis – in effortful DL – on understanding, has always neglected or rejected our need for connection.

 

Once we – in EL – connect – with ourselves and each other – understanding is not an issue at all. Similarly, in DL, people always make a big deal about listening. It is ad nauseum repeated that understanding is lacking, because we are not listening or paying attention. Supposedly, we need to become better listeners and then there will be more understanding. No matter how hard we try, the DL-speaker is not listening to him or herself. It is the listener, who listens to such an attention-demanding speaker, who provides him or her with the illusion, he or she is being listened to and connected with. Surely, this so-called connection isn’t really happening, as there is no reciprocation, no turn-taking, but only admiration, respect, politeness, looking up, but also, of course, fear, resentment, humiliation and oppression.

 

The aforementioned describes how with our DL, we establish the social hierarchy, which determines, who has the power, who may talk and who is actually allowed to dominate and force others, who are below him or her. Any such a power-trip prevents understanding, as it is antithetical to having a connection. In such a DL case, because there cannot be a connection, all the emphasis is on understanding.

 

In conclusion, all that really matters in DL – our usual way of talking – is that the listener obeys the speaker, who is not the listener. And, yes, if the DL-listener – who is used to DL-speakers – is finally him or herself speaking, then he or she is forcing his or her own “listener”, as he or she is incapable of connecting with him or herself. As a result of this, our so-called understanding of ourselves – in DL – is always about what we unknowingly have forced on ourselves and what we, inadvertently, will force onto others. 

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