Away,

 

The longer I have continued with my own Embodied Language (EL), the further away I have moved from my own Disembodied Language (DL), as well as the DL of others. Since most people engage in DL every day, I have had to distance myself from them, as much as possible, as I prefer to have EL. I know the difference between DL and EL and I can have this preference. Anyone who would know what I know, would also naturally want to go on with EL instead of DL. I go on with my EL and can only share it with someone, who also knows how to continue with it.

 

Today, I feel as if I have died to DL. These EL words, which, perhaps, will only be read posthumously, are not for anyone, who did not feel like talking with me while I was alive. I write these words for myself, because I am alive in my EL today. Anyone who is alive in EL, can understand, I am writing to him or to her. I feel grateful to those who have EL with me, but I feel at the same time disgusted by everyone, who refuses to explore EL with me. In written EL, we can finally call a spade a spade. I feel betrayed by those who pretend to be alive, but calmed down and comforted by those, who, like me, also died to their DL. To those, who can have EL, only someone with EL is alive, as everyone with DL is a zombie. I do not feel particularly negative to them, but I do not want to be with them, I do not like them and I no longer feel – as I used to – that I was missing out on anything, if they did not want to talk with me.  

 

Throwing myself away, would be, for me, trying to have EL with someone, who has DL and being again disappointed and negatively affected by DL, which then, inevitably, overtakes me. My tendency to still criticize DL has remained, although I have given up on teaching people about EL. In fact, I never say to anyone anymore, as I used to, that I do not want their DL, I only write about it, as saying it, got me in trouble, again and again. I never worked for me to get involved in DL. All arguing, debating, fighting, and, so-called reasoning about being right, always negatively affected me, in many ways. However, I have found out that writing about DL is without any negative consequences for me. To the contrary, it makes me feel, I have said what I wanted to say.

 

Those who read this and do not agree with me, will never talk with me. I enjoy putting their atrocious DL in its place, as I witness, that everyone, but me, is overtaken by it. When I would talk about it with others, I would be overtaken by it as well. I do not believe anyone can remain unaffected by spoken DL. Those who pretend to have EL, in one way or another, always try to make others believe, they are somehow above or beyond DL, but I am not above or beyond anyone. This issue of being better than others and of feeling superior or inferior, belongs to spoken DL. It is easy for me to write about DL with EL, as it protects me from getting involved in DL. Yes, I still like to comment on DL, as I can do that and I know very well, I am unique in that sense. Everyone who, unknowingly, unskillfully, unconsciously, tries to address DL, inadvertently, gets involved with it, but I do not. Of course, this is because I have made the distinction between spoken EL and DL, first, and only then began to write about it. Others, who have not done this, are inclined to believe that writing about this difference, will change and improve their ability to talk about, what they believe EL and DL to be. Everyone has their own sense of what EL and DL is, but no one has, like me, stopped participating in spoken DL, so that he or she could only continue with EL. We have overestimated the importance of written language, but undervalued the importance of our spoken language. And, we still stubbornly and violently continue to believe, our written words can address and correct the gigantic problems, we continue to have with our spoken communication.

 

Our unintelligent, morbid emphasis on everything that is written, keeps the illusion alive, that we can read and, supposedly, study, and learn our way into being better, more knowledgeable, moral, peaceful, and loving verbalizers, but nothing is further from the truth. Unless we start with listening to ourselves while we speak, we will only engage in spoken and in written DL. I am convinced, all our written texts derive from our spoken DL. Only someone, who has for some time, spoken with and listened to him or herself, was able to explore his or her own EL and can meaningfully write about how it is, to have EL with others. To him or her, it is out of the question, that anyone is benefitted from written or spoken DL and he or she, just like me, will be unable to speak about it with those, who continue with DL. Reading about the difference between DL and EL, is the only chance for those with DL, to not be again offended, to stop their own DL, and to explore their own EL.