Permission,

 

My Language Enlightenment (LE) became possible by giving myself, again and again, permission to fully explore my Embodied Language (EL). Neither my LE nor my EL is like anything you know about. Even I  cannot really tell you what it is, because it is always new and unless you have EL with me – and realize your own LE – there is no way to talk about it.

 

You don’t need my or anyone else’s permission, to express your EL and to acknowledge your LE. Such permission can only be given by you and never by someone else. The word permission comes from Latin, per-mittere, let pass, let go, let loose, give up, hand over; let, allow, grant; per-mit, from per, forward, though, hence; mittere, let go, send; also related to mission; grant liberty or leave. We leave behind our Disembodied Language (DL) and are no longer involved with it, as we have granted ourselves permission to have EL. 

 

Probably, you have been in situations, where you or someone said, I don’t need your permission anyway. Although it is said to someone else, we actually say it to ourselves, but, as the phrase itself illustrates, we refer to someone else and this prevents us from giving permission to ourselves. When we have some squabble about what to do or how to be, we may decide to go our own way or do things our own way, but we are clearly reacting to others and, therefore, we are never really giving ourselves the permission.

 

Although, with DL, we appear to be doing whatever the hell we want, this isn’t true, as we can only give ourselves permission, to do what we want or to be how we want to be, with our ongoing EL. Moreover, with DL, we remain busy with controlling others, so it is you, who, presumably, gives others permission. In EL, by contrast, it isn’t me, who is giving you the permission to express your LE, by it is you, yourself.

 

In the old days – and often even today – the groom asks the father of the bride permission to marry his daughter. Interestingly, bridegroom or bryd-guma, is old English, consisting of bryd, the bride and guma, the man, the suiter or servant. Suiter derives from Latin, secutor, follower, pursuer; sequi, to follow, come after; secundus, second, following. In EL, the marriage is between our behavior and our language – that is, our language follows or is adjusted to our behavior – only our EL can ask for the hand of our LE. In other words, permission implies that only our EL can adjust to our behavior, because if we would try to adjust our behavior to language, this wouldn’t be our own language, but the DL of someone else.

 

When you remain impaired by guilt, you never give yourself permission to move on. Freud called these habits, defense mechanisms, which we, according to him, develop, to protect us from the guilt, we would experience, if we gave ourselves permission to know how awful our desires really are. This is our neurotic reasoning based on our DL. What we want isn’t something terrible, but something good and giving ourselves permission to express our EL fulfills us.  

 

In DL, you must know your so-called place or there will be negative consequences. This means, you may only speak, when some other speaker – who is more important than you and higher in the social hierarchy – gives you permission to speak. Indeed, in DL, others constantly determine for us, what to say, when to speak and how to speak. In the forty years, that I have been talking and writing about EL, nobody, who had read or heard about my work, has ever given me permission, nobody has invited me, to come and speak about it. I have always invited myself everywhere. I know why. They couldn’t give me permission, as they don’t give it to themselves.  I don’t give anyone permission, to have EL, but I emphasize, we can give ourselves permission.