White Privilege,

 

My humor happens always only in the context of my own or someone else’s Embodied Language (EL). I can’t laugh about humor – basically all the so-called humor – which derives from Disembodied Language (DL). I find it boring and not funny, and I find myself funnier, but this writing is about my white privilege. I hope one day, you will engage in EL with me, so we can laugh about our Language Enlightenment (LE). I don’t believe in the black and white view of life, that is proposed by Critical Race Theory (CRT), but I do, of course, subscribe to my own DL-EL distinction, which, unequivocally, acknowledges and laughs about, that CRT is only talked about with DL.

 

I don’t need any other concept to analyze, how racism or, supposedly, radicalized societies, affect the lives of white or white-skinned people, than my own EL, which makes me laugh about the fact that, presumably, it is my problem, while in fact, it is, of course, the problem of disgruntled colored people, who try to accuse all white people for their misery.

 

My wonderful Chinese American wife, Bonnie, loves my jokes, but she is absolutely right, that I am only funny, if I don’t try to be funny and, even then, I am only funny, in spite of the fact, that I’m actually not that funny. As a child, in school, I was often punished and send out of the classroom, because I wouldn’t shut up saying things, which would make everyone laugh. Let me tell you something funny about my white privilege. I can talk about it, without any shame, as I accept my experience, as a white guy. Actually, it gets even worse. I am the ultimate expert on white privilege, because besides being white, I am also male and heterosexual. However, I am not – there were times, I prayed I was – some Chistian, high-testosterone, hairy dude. What you have heard, so far, about white privilege, wasn’t funny, because no white guy spoke about it, in such a way, that he was funny, but not trying to be funny.

 

Although I should feel bad about my white privilege, I am quite happy, with what I am expected to consider as my invisible package of unearned assets. My defiance is because I can afford to go on with my EL, because I know about the big difference between DL and EL. Indeed, any advantage I have, is not a sign of bias or prejudice, but of my truly superior intelligence. My ability to be happy, offends all unhappy people, not only those, who have a certain skin color or religion.   

 

I know very well, when I am not trying to be funny. I am funny, when you laugh about my white privilege, because I don’t give a shit about it. Yes, you’ve got that right, I am not even trying to be funny. I feel so  fortunate within my own white skin, that I will make the skin crawl of anyone, who tries to get under my skin. Anyone, who tries to get me out of my comfort zone, is going to consider, that there is, of course, a difference between my whiteness and my privilege.

 

Whiteness and privilege, are not necessarily related topics. When we casually mention them together – as many people of color and guilty white people do these days – things become quickly very confusing. I do proudly admit, my individual circumstances are quite different from most people, regardless of their skin color and, yes, prior to acquiring my citizenship, by legally immigrating the United States in 1999, I was still under the naive new-comer's impression, that all men were created equal. As a free individual, I must insist, I am – and I will always be – very different from everyone else.

 

I was never able to achieve any significant social status, yet, I feel totally fulfilled, how can that be? The whole world is full of people, who engage in DL, who tell others what to do and how to be, yet they couldn’t stop me from developing, in my own way, from doing only the work I wanted to do, from earning enough money, to live as I want to or from speaking and writing, with my EL, about my LE. Certainly, I only view myself or anyone else with EL, as normal, while I perceive everyone with DL, as totally crazy.     

 

I’ve done my fair share of playing the victim card, but it never worked for me. Owning up to my white privilege, was not some dumb, skin-deep, fanatic continuation, mixed-in with all the other fighting, blaming and complaining, that’s going on everywhere. To the contrary, I was not going to be one of those white losers, suckers and assholes, who believe, they can only laugh about others, but not about themselves.

 

According to me, it is not a person’s whiteness or skin color, which determines his or her social status, but his or her relative participation in DL or EL. Most of us have, unconscious DL every day. Only to the extent, we accidentally manage to experience any happiness at all – in our otherwise conflicted, problematic, miserable, superficial, meaningless lives – we have had brief moments of relief with our EL, in which, most likely, we could finally laugh a little bit, about the sad catastrophe, we have accepted as our lives. 

 

As a highly motivated, proud, white, privileged, tongue-in-cheek, racist, I really can and I do laugh much more about myself, than any other white people do. People hate me for saying this, but to me, it is not about my skin color, but about how I use my language. No other white people can claim the advantages of the privileges I possess, because I have, so to speak, come into my own. Somehow, I managed to stop myself, from trying to be special.  

 

Many white people whine about the fact, that they can be victims too – and quite frankly, I used to be one of them – but I am grateful for being constantly blamed for my white privilege, because that is how I managed, to get my head out my dark, stinking ass. Now, as a new American, I fully enjoy diversity, as I have come out my nasty white privilege. Yes, there was quite some shit, I needed to take care off. No one ever granted my right, to bear my white privilege as a badge of honor. I am one of the very exceptional white people, who not only can laugh about their own white privilege, but who also sees through and laughs about all the grifters, who play the race-card. 

 

I am not waiting for lame-laughter-approval from anyone, who can’t view themselves, as someone who has humor. Yes, my humor, is only for those who get it, who are privileged, as they can still laugh about scam-artists and race-hustlers. Naturally, my humor crosses the line, as it flows from my white privilege perspective, which everyone refuses to laugh about. I am not immune to being disliked by race-baters, but I prefer to have my white humor.

 

People, who give incendiary, humorless, speeches, who want to sell us their mediocre books, try to shame white people, in taking their expensive, torturous courses and insist, we should believe them, that white privilege operates in all of the major institutions of society, but at a personal level, the fact is, that everyone, unknowingly, engages in DL.   

 

Since the increased, forced awareness, about white privilege, couldn’t and didn’t produce the hoped for epic proportions of shame, we are now being told, that racial inequality can never again be treated as a laughing matter. My white privilege has never been satisfied with sneaky, miserly, micro-aggressions. My humor is about the lynching of the idea, that good old white racism is still there. We shouldn’t judge a white comedian’s ability to be funny, by the color of his skin, certainly not, if he reports the truth about his white privilege.

 

The common reaction of most white people – who are as ignorant, as people of color, about the difference between DL and EL – to white privilege, is defensiveness and often even outrage. There is something funny going on about the shame, fear, guilt, avoidance, discomfort, defensiveness, intolerability, invalidation or blatant weaponization of white privilege, which are echoes of the gloom and doom sermons, Christian people have endured, in their white privilege churches. In other words, their history is repeating itself and the strong white opposition is disgust rather than acceptance of their own long history with DL, which never allowed for any EL. Those, who want to force white people to believe in CRT, are the new priests.        

 

White supremacy wasn’t made into law, but spoken language was made into written language. Everyone seems to agree with this scam, that what is written is, presumably, more important than what is said. If there is any humor left, it proves, we acknowledge the importance of what we say. Black people aren’t any funnier than white people, by saying the word nigga many times. And, now that the humorless, oppressive, rigid Diversity-Equity-Inclusion (DEI) pendulum has swung so far to the left, that laughter isn’t allowed anymore, it is only possible, to laugh about racism, if a straight, white, seemingly racist guy, comes to the aide of people of color, with the hilarious observation, that there remains still a lot of untapped potential, for laughter, in the word nigga or in any other stupid stereotype for that – black lives – matter. We white people all probably know, we don’t laugh as much as black folks, but a little cultural appropriation is going to do the trick.

 

Enough of all the whining, there’s work to be done. We need to reach beyond the isle, imagine what it is like, to be in someone else’s skin and stop this total madness of crawling out of our own skin. We need to get more comfortable, not less comfortable, with white privilege. As long as you still feel uneasy, all you wish to do, is to escape and there is nothing to laugh about. We don’t dare talk about it, but there’s also a big problem with sand-niggas or Muslims. There’s no laughter anywhere in these dry deserts. They need all the white privilege help they can get, to radically step away from what has become, a humorless culture, which outlawed laughter. It has nothing to do with my skin, that my white privilege is the realization, that all religion prevents laughter.  

 

Might is not right and your laughter is the only way forward. I am committed to my white privilege and I use it for the common good. Don’t paint a target on my back for denying white racism, as my innocence, my individuality, my assumption of my intelligence, my freedom to be who I am, is up to me, but not to you or someone else. Get out of your own cultural prison. Feel inspired by this white privileged man, who stopped crying about spilled milk and throwing out the nonverbal child with the verbal bath water. White pride tells us not to blame others for our own misery, but to be truly a happy man, who is not just trying to be funny. Don’t say white privilege doesn’t apply, but say – and hear – DL doesn’t apply to you and have some EL.