Conditional Humor,

 

I only deal in conditional humor. A conditional joke is a joke meant for a qualified audience only. If you don’t know anything about the big difference between Disembodied Language (DL) and Embodied Language (EL), you are unable to get my humor, because you only appreciate the so-called humor, which deals with your coercive DL, but my gentle, calm, subtle humor, which comes from my ongoing EL, simply goes over your head.

 

Unless you know about your own EL, you can’t understand my humor. However, my conditional humor doesn’t care, if you laugh or not. I didn’t decide that, but you keep defending – with your forceful, dull DL – against anything that goes against your beliefs. But, guess what? All real humor goes against anyone’s beliefs. Moreover, your beliefs aren’t really a laughing matter, as there’s nothing funny about them at all and that’s why they need to be left behind, by you.

 

This may be your first experience of conditional humor. You can laugh only, if you let go of your outdated beliefs. If you don’t find this funny, it means, you are digging in your heels, which is what you usually do. It’s fine with me, that you don’t laugh. It is the story of your miserable life, in which you rather hang on to your beliefs than have some fun. In EL, your laughter isn’t about any of your beliefs, which are completely forgotten. Unless you become very sensitive, very open, very honest, very courageous, very truthful, there’s nothing for you to laugh about. Some prior knowledge and understanding of your ongoing EL are needed, before you can laugh with me.

 

Your previous experience of conditional humor was always about the – with DL – internalized negative stereotypes. This fake-humor always deals with discriminatory laughter about some ethnic, racial, religious or political group. With EL, there are no groups to laugh about, because there is no one else to laugh about, except you yourself. If you ever manage to get to it, which is very unlikely – as you demand to have your phony-humor fix with DL – you’ll be surprised how much fun it is to laugh about yourself.

 

With your unconscious DL, there’s nothing to laugh about, because you’re full of frustration, confusion, problems, but also, arrogance and hate. How are supposed to be able to laugh, if you keep hanging on to all this negativity? You can’t laugh, because you can’t admit, that you are full of shit. Don’t make it seem as if you can laugh, because the truth is, that you’ve got to get rid of it, all of it. Those, who have made you laugh, but didn’t address your preoccupation with conflicts, arguments, debates, wars, moral high-ground or that you are right and others are wrong, they don’t really know about laughter.

 

I’m not laughing because I am right, but I laugh because I don’t give a damn whether you laugh with me or not, whether you believe me or not, whether you are as happy as I am or not. I am not anyone’s savior. Yes, I’ll laugh in spite your failure to live your own life according to what you find enjoyable. I’ll laugh about what I find pleasurable and each of us can only know for ourselves, what we like to say and know to be energizing, uplifting and enriching. If we don’t say that to ourselves or keep saying it to others, we miss out on the fun of living own individual lives.

 

Since we never say – with great precision, with ongoing EL – what is making us laugh, what is making us happy, what is making us whole, we remain dreadful, dissatisfied, hopeless, anxious, worried and angry. It has never occurred to you, but the reason you don’t laugh, is because you just don’t have what it takes. You don’t have the right knowledge, the right attitude and you don’t even listen to yourself, so you can’t even hear what is funny, even if you said it was funny.

 

You have neither talked nor laughed about your own unaddressed chaos, your fanatic hype, your grotesque delusion and stubborn pretention. It is so funny, because it is such a mess. I laugh not because I am better than you, but because I hear myself when I speak, and you don’t. It may seem like a small difference and in reality it is, whether you can laugh at yourself – whether you hear your absurdity, whether you can acknowledge your own madness, whether you can feel the enormous tension, fear, pressure, doom and gloom and, ultimately, the atomic boom, in this morning or this afternoon, in your room – that is what determines, whether you will live in heaven or hell.

 

I can’t make you knowledgeable or conscious about your own ongoing EL. You will have to do this yourself. In conditional humor, you only get  the joke if you already know what I am talking about. For example, if you don’t know what a pizza is, you are not going to get the following joke. Question: What is the difference between this pizza and your opinion? Answer: I asked for the pizza. It is unlikely, you don’t know what a pizza is. Likewise, you know damn well what DL is. So, what is funnier, your DL or your EL? Your answer should be: my EL, because my DL sucks. This isn’t funny, but it is funny, because it isn’t.

 

You’ve got to start talking, out loud, alone, with yourself and listen attentively to your voice, so you can finally begin to let yourself know about the great difference between your DL and your EL. To hear my humor, you’ve got to listen to yourself and not to me. Of course, my humor isn’t really mine anyway, because it is yours when you say and hear it. As of yet, however, that hasn’t happened and you couldn’t hear it, as you didn’t say it. In other words, you didn’t fulfill the absolutely necessary requirements for laughter and that is why you’re so negative. The days, that others will create for you the illusion of having fun are over, as it no longer produces even a phony smile, let alone, a bombastic, forgetful outburst of hysteria, which is basically the sickest form of virtue-signaling: laughing to show others, you are having such great fun.