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In your usual way of dealing language, which I call Disembodied Language (DL), you are always holding back. You could say, write, express, address, become conscious about, understand and enjoy, much more of your own verbal behavior, than you currently do, if you stopped yourself from stopping yourself and if you gave yourself total permission, to say and write, what you want to say and write and are capable of saying or writing. If you did that, you would change your negative attitude about your own language and discover your own Embodied Language (EL). And, in effect, you would start using your own intelligence.  

 

Since you mechanically, unconsciously and stupidly engage in DL, every day, your language isn’t working for you, but against you. You can’t hear, what you haven’t said, because you don’t even know, that you don’t even like to listen to the sound of your own voice and, therefore, you never listen to your body or your own experience. Consequently, you can’t read, in your own words, about the results of your  actions, because they were so terrible, you were not inclined to write about them. The real meaning of having faith, is to have faith in your own language.

 

If you happen to read my words, which were written for myself, you feel, you get back something, which was missing in your life: attention for your language. The power of having and sharing your own language (EL), is awesome. I just heard, that Obama receives $400,000 for a speech, but neither he nor any other famous person has EL. He is paid this much, as what he says is assumed to be important, but what I say in this writing is of greater importance. It’s priceless.

 

It is so wonderful, to be who I am. I am enlightened. I like to say it and write it, because I love to hear myself and read about my Language Enlightenment (LE). If you find your way to my words, you will read about and feel your own LE too, because what I write and speak about, is for everyone. Our EL reveals our LE, which is our true nature. This is as true for me as it is for you. Of course, like you, I have also endlessly struggled, because my DL couldn’t express who I am or let me be who I am. My body dysphoria didn’t result in the absurd conclusion, I am a woman in a man’s body, but in the abnegation of my DL. In my DL, I tried to be how others wanted me to be, but it didn’t work. However, although I have often made the mistake to believe otherwise, my EL is not how I want to be with my language.

 

There is no me, who wants to or claims to have EL, as in EL, there is nobody who has it. Moreover, I also don’t want others, you, to have EL, because there is nobody to have EL with. In EL, we dissolve, that’s it. Your LE is expressed by your EL and all your drama ends. This is the most precious gift of my EL: I don’t want to have EL with anyone, who doesn’t want it. What a relief. My false sense of identity, of who I believed myself to be, was about being heard, being listened to, being respected, being welcomed, being celebrated, but now all that has dropped away and I can’t even imagine anymore, I wanted that for such a long time. Right now, I go with the flow and there is, of course, no I, who goes with the flow, because there’s just only the flow of this lovely language, which expresses itself so naturally and effortlessly.

 

Every time my language stops, there is space for new things to be said or written. I like those pauses, which announce a new revelation. Not everything I say or write is equally significant, but I couldn’t say or write what is significant, if I didn’t say or write what is unimportant. It is just as important to me, to say or write what is unimportant, as to say or write what is important. In DL, we slam each other with what is supposedly important, but we forget to pay attention to what is unimportant. What is important in DL, is blissfully unimportant in EL. Only someone like me – who has EL, who pays attention to what is important and what is unimportant – can write or say something, like this, which is truly important.