Refinement,  

 

I went to bed at 7pm and woke up at 11:45pm, so I already slept almost 5 hours. It feels so nice, to be up for a little while, to write something and, then, to go back to sleep again, for couple of hours more. A process of refinement began to reveal itself to me yesterday and I want to write about it. Everything just seems to be more and more perfect. Of course, these are just words, but I am experiencing this.

 

I am feeling so utterly peaceful and fulfilled and these words are drenched in my bliss. I don’t have what people would call inner bliss, but what I call verbal bliss. What I am experiencing, is the result of how I deal with my language. What I am writing about, can only be experienced if one has Embodied Language (EL) instead of Disembodied Language (DL). I am not making this up. You could do this too.

 

Although the refinement of my EL happens by itself, it is definitely something I do. I know for sure, you don’t do it, that’s why you can’t be happy. Surely, you could have EL instead of DL, but to accomplish that, you’ve got to pay attention to your language. Everything else, supposedly, is more important to you than your language and, therefore, you can’t reap the fruits of the optimal use of your verbal behavior. In DL, you function below your ability.

 

For many years, I didn’t dare to be this happy, as I felt guilty, that I was the only one. I have always felt rejected by people and yet, on numerous occasions people have wondered, how it is possible, that I am always so enthusiastic and energized. Even today, hardly anyone ever talks with me, but I’ve come to terms with it. Most people are simply too miserable to talk with me. I no longer feel sad for others, that they don’t have my happiness. My refinement tells me: I’ve always been able to share my happiness.

 

My other behaviors – being married to my lovely wife Bonnie, seeing a movie or going to the market together, working out in the gym, doing my qigong practice, jogging in Upper Bidwell, swimming in the creek, playing on my ukulele and sometimes singing my songs at the Open Mike of Secret Trail Brewery – are all made possible by my EL. Also, I work hard every day, as a delivery driver for a company, which supplies landscaping materials. I love my physical job, which requires me to stay in shape and live a regular life. Each Friday, I am happy, it is weekend.

 

I don’t worry or get upset about anything anymore and if I do, I laugh at myself for being such a fool. I can say or write this, but you can’t and that is why your life is such an enormous mess. With your DL, you always pretend to be someone, who you are not. Your twisted way of dealing with your language inevitably creates an unnatural way of life, in which you burn yourself out on what is impossible, but you ignore what is possible and necessary. What is so very beautiful about my refinement is: I’m not trying to make my life better, by presumably making small changes or removing impurities. Believe it or not, everything just unfolds, by itself, due to my EL.

 

I am capable of having and enjoying my graceful experiences and manners, as my EL determines and enhances everything I do. Since I’ve stopped doing what everyone else is doing, I am not involved in DL. The contrast between my sensitive, elegant, certain, fearless and humorous behavior and the defensive, anxious, suspicious, angry, stressful, boring behavior of others, is getting more and more obvious, since I am no longer feeling guilty about not fitting in. Yes, one moment, I may like to grow my beard and look like an old man, but the next moment, I shave it off  and I very look young again. I also have many hats.

 

Making subtle points, fine distinctions or delicate, profound, intriguing observations, just isn’t possible with blunt, unconscious, effortful DL. For instance, in DL, everyone remains completely unaware about the immense importance of talking, out loud, alone, with yourself and, specifically, listening to the sound of your own voice. In this way, you can begin to say the things, to yourself, which you could never say in your stressful DL conversation with others. In effect, you would begin to discover your own EL, by talking out loud, alone, with yourself. There is a different logic to EL, which is based on your own intelligence.

 

While anyone, who engages, like me, in EL, will embark on a magnificent process of revitalization, civilization, maturation and expansion, those, who continue with their DL, will do the exact opposite. With DL, one inevitably becomes exhausted, lost, frustrated, imprisoned, stuck, fanatic and stale. I believe mankind is at a crossroads. I discovered EL and I can tell you, that once you discover it, there is no way back. Although hardly anyone wants to believe me, the difference between DL and EL is the quintessential issue of our time and is going to be with us for a long time. My refinement is apparent in everything I have written in this blog and this is the proof my EL is real and not just merely an ideal.