Proper Behavior,

 

For anyone to meet and talk with me, they will have to conduct themselves properly. I consider your usual, unconscious way of talking, in which you don’t listen to yourself, while you speak, to be improper and unacceptable. You keep having this improper behavior, because no one else is able to point out, that your habitual way of dealing with language, is ineffective, incorrect, inappropriate and unsuitable. I don’t teach you proper behavior, but demand it! You either stop your own Disembodied Language (DL), so you can have Embodied Language (EL) or I don’t even want to talk with you or have anything to do with you. In EL, nobody demands anything from anyone. That is the proper way of talking.     

 

If someone never had a proper job, we mean to say, that he or she never had a real job. When a painter doesn’t have the proper tools, he or she doesn’t have the right brushes, paint or canvas. To receive proper treatment, one has to go to a specialist, who is knowledgeable and capable. When my eyes are all blurry and I couldn’t see properly, I wasn’t able to see correctly. We had nodded and said hello to one another, but had never had a proper introduction, indicates we never paid careful attention to each other. You need to go on an appropriate or proper diet, if you want to lose weight. When we are talking about Malaria, Ebola or Cholera we distinguish or identify a group of diseases, that are proper to the tropics. Use of proper quotation marks connotes an academic fitness marked by nicety and discrimination. The underlined words give you an idea, why proper behavior is necessary.

 

In the same way, that proper detective work calls for an orderly investigation, proper speech requires the extensive exploration of what it is like, to listen to ourselves while we speak and to experience the gigantic difference between DL and EL. We only know the proper thing to say, to ourselves, when we engage in EL, but as long as we – because we were conditioned to listen to others – engage in DL, we are forever concerned, worried, anxious or stressed about,  whether we say the right things to others and we remain totally oblivious about speaking with ourselves in a self-regulating manner, with an authentic-sounding voice, we enjoy to listen to.

 

When you engage with me in ongoing EL, you will have the proper responses and we will both equally enjoy our conversation. In DL, it appears someone is always more important than the other. Consequently, the, supposedly, superior person, presumably, enjoys the conversation, while the, supposedly, inferior person has to behave politely, obediently, accommodatingly and properly. Interestingly, a powerful person or a top-dog, may express or show his or her negative emotions and is able to get away with his or her forceful, manipulative, inconsiderate DL, but the under-dog, is always expected to suck it up and maintain the illusion of positivity.

 

During EL, there is turn-taking and reciprocation of proper, positively-stimulating responses, but in DL, the so-called communication is a one-way street, during which one speaker is allowed and even expected to dominate the listener. Surely, such a listener isn’t even permitted to speak and must know his or her, supposedly, proper place. In a job, you should receive proper pay for your work, but in daily conversation – which is DL – you never receive proper attention. It is because your conditioning history, you accept this as normal, but once you find out about the difference between your DL and EL, you realize it is improper to be treated like that. Moreover, you fully understand, only EL, in which we listen to ourselves while we speak, is the proper way.

 

During EL, we don’t interfere with each other, because we are in touch with ourselves. This means, we have proper boundaries and, yes, we recover from our DL, in which there were never any proper boundaries. What people in DL – during our common, fear-based, chaotic, conversations – consider to be psychological problems, should be summarized as a complete lack of proper boundaries. Certainly, during DL, we have improper boundaries, due to which we are unable to have honest, open conversations.

 

Under proper circumstances, our EL will flow naturally and effortlessly. I not only know, but I also create and maintain these circumstances and anyone, who comes to talk with me, must trust me, to guide their behavior. I immediately notice if anyone resists me and I don’t tolerate anyone’s DL. I expect you to stop your own DL and I will reject you, if you come with your DL to me. I do this, as it is the proper thing to do.

 

If you behave properly to me, you will be able to recognize, the proper feelings, which belong to EL, are so nourishing, energizing, healing and enlightening. With EL, you will feel better than you have ever done before. Furthermore, it is proper for your EL and for these new experiences to continue and, yes, it is proper, to acknowledge, that the continuation of your EL reveals your Language Enlightenment (LE). With your ongoing EL, you can’t miss your LE, as you are the proper authority, to speak about this.