Repeat,

 

Why do you senselessly repeat, what you have done a million times, but which doesn’t make you happy? Basically, you are unhappy, as you keep repeating your own unhappiness. To be happy, this repetition must come to an end. However, you can’t seem to stop your mechanical, meaningless, unconscious behavior. Of course, you wouldn’t do what you keep doing, if you knew you were doing it, but that’s the issue: you don’t know, why you repeat your misery.

 

You repeat your problems and you have remained stuck in a stressful, restless, chaotic, cruel, neurotic, boring, superficial, conflicted, fragmented, dull and effortful way of life, as you have you never allowed your language to turn towards you. To the contrary, you have imagined, that you could turn yourself to your so-called mind, to your so-called thoughts and, thus, you have created your belief about who you are, which, obviously, isn’t true, as it is impossible to hang on to your grandiose delusion and pretention.  

 

Your energy is exhausted by, supposedly, being you and you lack any motivation for anything, that isn’t part of your repetitive, habitual, rigid repertoire. Moreover, your fear and anxiety, is not about what you didn’t have the guts to do, but about what you didn’t dare to stop doing. Only by identifying and by radically stopping your ineffective behavior, will you  experience the energy or the so-called motivation, to engage in behaviors, which are effortless, new and effective, because they have positive outcomes.

 

Effortful behavior is repetitive and unconscious, but effortless behavior is new and conscious. It never was clear to you, that your happiness derives from being effortless and natural. Had this been the case, you would, like me, forget about the importance of your so-called thoughts and simply begin to allow your language to be expressed by speaking with and listening to yourself. Furthermore, by writing – to yourself – about this process of rediscovering, reclaiming, repurposing, reaffirming, reviving and reappropriating your own language, you would also read, agree with and understand, your own writings and know, that it is true, that language can come to you and that your overrated mind has disappeared.

 

Another reason, you have repeated yourself for so long, so tenaciously, so stupidly and so insensitively, is that your attention was constantly drawn to other things, which, presumably, were more important than your language. In other words, you have never given priority to your language and, therefore, in Disembodied Language (DL), you speak – without even realizing it – every day, with a voice, which – once you listen to it – doesn’t even sound like you.  

 

When you, so to speak, catch and stop your own DL and switch to Embodied Language (EL), you instantly feel and know, that you got it right, because you no longer repeat yourself, you express something new. What’s more, EL keeps being new and this gives you great joy. You can’t repeat the new, yet, surprisingly,  you are in a flow of language, which reveals a new meaning to whatever you currently experience or have experienced in the past. I sometimes describe it, as a form of verbal archeology, because you can talk about anything you want to talk about and due to your EL, there is new understanding of how you have lived, which resulted into how you live today.

 

All of this, probably, is inconceivable to you at this moment, as you are so used to being involved in DL, but your usual way of dealing with language can be stopped, when you realize, that you were pushing it, forcing it, expecting it, hoping and praying for it and, certainly, in DL you are just making things up. Even if you succeed in only having a brief instance of EL, you already experience the tremendous relief of not doing what you, until that moment, had been doing.

 

You will have EL, when you surrender yourself to what you really want to say. Even without knowing anything about the difference between DL and EL, you already had some brief, spontaneous moments of EL. Usually people would describe this as: words just came to me. They did and they do, but only if we are not preventing this with our phony voice. In DL, you speak with a sound, you yourself don’t like and, therefore, don’t want to hear. However, this never becomes clear in a conversation with others, but only if you have a conversation with yourself.

 

While having a conversation with yourself, you will quickly find out, that there is not and there cannot be, a you, who is separate from the conversation. Stated differently, having a conversation with ourselves means, we are simply talking out loud – alone – and hearing ourselves, that is, the speaker is the listener. In other words, there is only language, produced, received and experienced by you. The same individual – in addition to simultaneously speaking and listening – is experiencing positive or negative feelings, about what he or she is saying. Individual, comes from Latin in-dividuus, in – not, opposite of + dividuus, divisible, dividere, divide.

 

Surprisingly, once we have EL instead of DL, we find that isn’t – as we have always assumed – harder or more difficult, to listen to our own negative, than to our own positive emotions. However, we justifiably say that – about other people – as it is indeed very tiring to listen someone, who isn’t listening to him or herself, who, therefore, unconsciously, demands our attention with his or her drama and problems. We can easily listen to our own troubles, stressors, fears or heartaches, as, in EL, we are able, to give our verbal attention, to whatever asks our attention.

 

With our EL, we give new meaning to our DL and we can hear that everything becomes clear. When we finally speak with and listen to ourselves, we really hear and acknowledge what is true and what is not. Since we recognize and say what feels good and what feels bad, we can stop feeling bad and start feeling good. As our EL continues and DL is further and further left behind, we find ourselves living a different life, because we have not only stopped our DL, but we have also stopped any other negative behavior, since we instructed ourselves to do this.

 

Our self-knowledge blossoms in our language and our Language Enlightenment (LE), is the expression of who we have always been, but couldn’t express with DL. Thus, in EL, although we keep speaking the same words – and don’t become miraculously fluent in a new language – we never repeat ourselves, as we have stepped out of our history of conditioning. Nothing bothers us any longer, as, in EL, everything is verbalized exactly as it is or was. Therefore, as our DL is expressed, experienced and understood – with our EL – a transformation happens, due to which everything falls into place. Our LE is the awareness that everything has meaning to us, because we can express it with our EL. When we don’t repeat, we  give our own meaning to our life, with our language.