To give in,

Of course, you don't want to give in, talk to me and admit, there is a huge difference between Embodied Language (EL) and Disembodied Language (DL), because you feel embarrassed, as it would expose your DL. In fact, you are ashamed, you have always been unconsciously busy with deplorable, stupid, obsessive, reactionary DL. Annoyingly, EL is such an obvious thing and yet, you have totally missed it.

 

When you read these words, you involuntarily feel a sensation of discontent, insult and humiliation, since somehow you know, it is exactly as I say it is. You are caught by me, in the madness, which I call DL, but which you have continued to regard as normal. You never got to EL because you don't want to admit, you are ignorant of your own language. You feel cheated, even though you know very well,  I have nothing to do with the lies you were saddled with, first by others and then by yourself. Yes, you would even accuse me of holding you back from EL.

 

You can't get over your hesitation to finally throw the door of your EL all the way open, by talking to me. I know, it's a big step, because there's no going back once you talk to me. Once you continue with EL, your DL will be over. You know, I will continue with my EL, in spite of your reservations.

 

Everything you give as a reason not to talk to me, not to call me, not to meet with me on a skype call (my skype name is limbicease), is proof of the fact that you choose to continue with DL. Ridiculous that – after all these years of living and experiencing how problematic your usual handling of language is – you still cannot admit that you have created the illusion, for yourself, that you already have EL. You may have had a very small amount of EL, but you never went through with it, because you simply didn't know how that would work.

 

Admitting your ignorance is a mixture of misplaced pride, hurt and doggedness. Is it really true, that truly being yourself isn’t possible for you? Talking to me doesn’t make you my follower, and yet you keep having such a feeling, until you have applied yourself to your language and reclaimed it. You may say something vaguely like, you want to do your own thing or that you want to go your own way – and, therefore, you absolutely don’t want to do my thing or go my way - but what is your thing or your way, if you can’t speak or write about it with EL?

 

However you look at it, you have no idea what fits with you - what is, therefore, truly yours - because you never stopped your automatic participation in DL. Your absurd belief in going your own way, is a fixed idea because you want to be someone special. It doesn't make you different from others, that you know there's only one like you, but it would make a big difference, if your handling of language reflected that. If you take responsibility to move forward with your EL, you must know, acknowledge and accept that everyone has, unknowingly, been stuck in DL. If you have ongoing EL, then you are always new in  your language, but this isn’t the case yet. Even if you say you want to be new, that doesn't make you new.

 

When will you finally admit, there is a big difference between wanting something and doing what you have to do, to achieve what you want? You have wanted so many things, but you have always forgotten, because of your language. Like everyone else, you keep pretending, that it will eventually happen, but in reality, you keep putting it off and so much time has already passed with all kinds of lies.

 

There is also a sense, while reading my words, you have stopped – yourself – from continuing with EL as you have continued with DL. It is unpleasant to admit this to others, for it is an obvious sign that, as far as you are concerned, you have completely missed the mark. So, you want to pretend to others that you know what it is, but to yourself, you nevertheless know that this is not true. Admitting to yourself, this is so, is not enough to have EL with me, because in order to have EL with me – or with anyone else – you will have to be able to admit to others, what you have admitted to yourself. Time after time, you have been denying yourself, you have given yourself away and thus you have harmed yourself while you were overtaken again by DL. You have always described this self-abuse incorrectly.

 

You may sometimes admit, to others, that you were, so to speak, stuck in your head or in your mind, but that is not correct, as far as handling of language is concerned. Something very different is taking place than your usual descriptions. What is it, when you say and hear, that you think something? You say it, you hear it, but there is no such thing, as thinking at all. What is it, when you write, that you supposedly think? You write it and you can write it, because thinking doesn't exist at all. Someone with EL never experiences a writer’s block. The only proof - which is of course not a proof at all - that your so-called thinking really exists, is that you say it or write it, so that it can be heard or read. If in the end that should ever be the case, that you started saying what only you could say and wrote what only you could write – to yourself – then you know, that your handling of language has changed and made it irrefutably clear , that your thinking or having a mind doesn’t exist. In other words: there is no such thing as finding or going your own way. We all go exactly the same way, because we all just die one day.

 

EL is the awareness of impermanence expressed in language. We simply cannot turn away from the fact of our death, as we have come to recognize death with our language and regard it as something that happens during our communication. So, we really solve our fear of death during EL. It is not sad, but very uplifting and revealing, for we no longer put off living because of our fear of death, which is lifted by our EL. With our EL, we will not only say what we can and want to say, but we will also do everything that we can and want to do. So, it is absolutely inconceivable, someone with EL would not want to talk to someone else who also has EL, because they both know, they are the only few individuals who are capable of doing this. This gives us a grateful feeling, that lasts forever, as it is preserved because we remain loyal to EL, continue to share it with each other and, therefore, also make it known to others.