Writing,

 

While I was studying psychology, the thing I enjoyed most, was writing papers. I never saw the need for quoting what someone else had said or written, as I always wanted to write about my own language. As anyone who reads my writing can tell, I only write about who I turned out to be, with my Embodied Language (EL). I am no longer interested in who I was, due to my conditioning with Disembodied Language (DL), because I can now fully understand why I was that way. Yes, I am self-realized, and my writing has played an important role in describing and establishing my Language Enlightenment (LE).

 

When I discovered, in my early twenties, the great  difference between my DL and EL, I only wanted to speak about it with others, so that people could hear it and have it. Many people suggested, I should write a book about it, but to me, such suggestions  indicated, they weren’t interested in experiencing EL. I was and I still am aware, people appreciate the written word, more than the spoken word. I am so glad, I have continued with the spoken version of my EL. This writing is the consequence of that fact.

 

Whenever someone has EL, he or she is listening to him or herself, while he or she speaks and he or she is saying, what he or she is saying, to him or herself. Although I know, others can read and understand it, I write this for myself. People who don’t know about the difference between DL and EL, don’t know and cannot know, that all the writing, that was done by others, was based on DL. This writing or the writing of my dear Dutch friend AnnaMieke – who, like me, finds talking out loud with herself and listening to her voice and, thus, experiencing her own ongoing EL, more productive, than talking with others and, inevitably, being exposed to or getting involved in DL – is the only writing, which is based on EL. You can only read about our EL and LE on our blogs.

 

Whenever we are obediently, unconsciously and effortfully listening, to a handful of, presumably, important, knowledgeable, distinguished speakers – without realizing, we never even get the chance, to say something ourselves – we don’t realize, these eloquent, prominent, persuasive speakers – who, of course, only succeed in getting all the attention, by dominating, by determining and by, in one way or another, forcing the so-called conversation – only say what they or others have written. Their speech is scripted, pre-determined, acted and phony.

 

When I went to college and took a speech class, I was infuriated and totally disappointed, to find out, that I was taught and expected, to write my speech, before I could, supposedly, say what wanted to say, in a most convincing – manipulative – way. It really goes against everything I stand for. It goes without saying, I did very badly in that class, because I didn’t want to do, what I was supposed to do. However, it was an eye-opener, to find out that, unfortunately, all public speaking, is always based on writing about what is said. And, this is why practically every public person has written a book, which perpetuates the already existing detrimental notion, that the written word, is more important than the spoken word.  

 

Before I enrolled in the Psychology program of Palo Alto University, I was promised, I would be able to determine my own research topic. However, after I had successfully completed all my course work and was accruing my clinical hours, by giving therapy to severely mentally ill and traumatized people, I was told in a forceful manner, by the mean and arrogant director, that with regard to writing my dissertation, I had to follow the research of my supervisor and that I could write about whatever I wanted, after I had achieved the Ph.D. This was a total betrayal. I hope they read this and give me my money back. I withdrew from the program, because I had wanted to write about, what I am writing about on my blog.

 

I am glad, I didn’t become a psychologist. With my master's degree I became a psychology instructor at Butte College, where one of the assignments, to all my students, was to write a one-page paper, which started with the sentence: when I speak alone with myself and listen to the sound of my voice, then… They would experience, what it is like, to speak with and listen to themselves and then write about that. It was so revealing and so beautiful, what they were writing. I still consider receiving all these wonderful papers as my biggest accomplishment, as a teacher.

 

Certainly, this writing or anyone’s writing about EL, will let you know, that EL really exists, but you will only be able to experience it, if you begin to talk out loud with yourself and listen to your voice. Reading someone else’s writing isn’t changing our behavior, as it distracts us from paying attention to our EL, our own language, with which we instruct ourselves, to be happy and to behave as we want to. Yet, reading our own writing is a different matter, especially, if it is about our EL. By writing and reading about my EL, I have turned the corner on my conditioning history with DL and have become stabilized in my LE. I was against writing about EL in the beginning, because I intuitively didn’t want to be burdened with writing, which must have derived from people their inability to acknowledge the existence of EL, let alone, of the continuation of EL, which would reveal their LE.