Often,

 

You hear so often, that people say, they want to be respected, accepted or validated – by others – but they don’t realize, they themselves don’t possess the Embodied Language (EL), which is needed to be able to feel that way. Oddly, they expect others, to have, what they themselves don’t have. People with Disembodied Language (DL) often want others to do for them, what they cannot do for themselves. In other words, they don’t have their own language, to feel happy about themselves. If they would have their own EL, they would stop demanding from others, that they should make them feel good.

 

The only reason that people so often make such a big deal about being themselves, is because they are not themselves, they cannot be themselves, because they engage in DL, which prevents them from being themselves. Someone with EL, never talks about being him or herself, as in EL, it is not an issue. So much would change, if people would find out, about the difference between their own DL and their EL. Their own EL is truly their own language.   

 

We have DL much more often than we should and we don’t even realize we engage in it, almost all the time. Once we experience the difference between our DL and our EL, we will still have some DL, but it will become less and less, while our EL will happen more and more often. Everyone is vulnerable to unconsciously act out their conditioning history with DL, but DL doesn’t work for any of us. In fact, in DL, language works against you. If you would admit, how harmful, troubling and undermining DL – your habitual way of dealing with your language – is, you would have stopped it already. Actually, in DL, you don’t use your language, but language is using you. How often did you not imagine, that your so-called crazy mind or racing thoughts, wouldn’t leave you alone? This common illusion is the result of your DL.

 

With DL, you always underperform, as you never get clear, about why your language seems to imprison you. By writing this, I am also referring, to what has happened to me. It wasn’t until I immigrated to the United States, that I became educated and until I studied psychology and behaviorism, I didn’t really know anything about the lawfulness of behavior. All I knew, up to that point, was my own struggle and my few victories in overcoming my own problematic behavior. I studied and I taught, but oddly, it was before I went back to school – to be a student, and, later, to be a psychology instructor – that I gave all my seminars, workshop and sessions, about what I  then called The Language That Creates Space. I didn’t know much of anything then, yet it was enough to do what I did. Now that I am retired from teaching and trying to get people interested in EL, I simply write this, because I enjoy it and because others may still read it, hear it and begin to try it.

 

I have often tried, in every possible way, to get you interested in EL, but nothing has worked, so I have given up. I have always known, it works this way, but my DL conditioning wasn’t immediately finished, after I discovered my EL. To the contrary, it was only then, that I slowly began to become aware, about how often I was in the grip of my own mechanical DL. I am so happy, I don’t try feel that pressure any more, I have to reach others. May be these words reach you, because I only write them for myself?  

 

I view my ability, to stop my DL, to have EL and to talk about my Language Enlightenment (LE), as an acquired skill. If you want to know math, you must take a math class and listen to your math teacher. If you want to learn about electricity, you must learn from someone, who knows about it. However, you cannot learn from me. The only thing I offer, is that you can talk with me, about DL, EL and LE, but you must already be interested in it, as I am not going to encourage you or do anything for you. I like to talk about my EL and LE, that’s all. I could go on with it all day. My EL and my LE are absolutely priceless, but your DL is intolerable nonsense to me. You must stop it by yourself, to be able to have EL with me.  

 

At this point in life, I am 65 years and seven days old. I just want to be able to go on with my EL and express my LE. I have made a short video, to record my Thanks Giving greetings. It came out really good,  as I was able to link Thanks Giving, to the way in we deal with language. Thankfulness isn’t something that is reserved for one special day, but I like to use that day, to express, how I feel, every day. I am truly grateful for everything, that has happened to me.

 

I also feel a sense of forgiveness, as everyone, who negatively affected me, unknowingly, contributed to where I am today. Due to all the rejection, I have experienced, I couldn’t have gone to anything else than my LE. My urge, to have EL, has nothing to do with EL, per-se, as it is the only expression of who I am and have always been. If you are yourself, you will often have EL. Your EL, like any other behavior, is lawful. In Holland, people mainly speak Dutch, but in England, they mainly speak English. If they chose to do so – study and read some books – some Dutch people may learn some English and some British people may learn some Dutch. However, the fact of these languages is, if one doesn’t speak it, hear it, read it or write it, one can’t learn it. Yes, one cannot learn anything, by – as we say – thinking about it.

 

Strictly speaking – pun intended – when we speak about thinking, we are actually procrastinating. We are so often unable to talk, that we imagine, to have an inner conversation with ourselves, but the reality is, that we are so often postponing to talk, that we completely forget about it and are no longer talking, because our imaginary thinking, has become such an obsessive illusion, that we have tragically even begun to believe, that talking is no longer necessary.

 

Quietly reading these words and deluding yourself, that you are thinking about it, is putting off the real work, that needs to be done to acquire EL. You don’t know EL and you aren’t going to have it, by reading my texts or by listening to me, but if you talk with me, you will come out of your dissociative DL, as it will be very clear, your EL isn’t some fantasy about having a mind, having thoughts or being involved in some illusive, deep, inner process. Talking with me  makes clear, once and for all, there is no language inside of you. Even though you have often spoken, as if there are words and sentences in your head, this way of speaking was DL. There cannot be any language inside of our heads, as this is not how we have learned our language. If our parents, family, friends, neighbors, preachers and teachers wouldn’t have spoken with us, we wouldn’t have been able to acquire it. Likewise, with EL, if no one speaks with you in that way, you aren’t going to learn it. Nobody spoke with you in that way, that is why you don’t know it. I can do that and if you talk with me, you’ll be surprised how easy and self-evident it is. It is the same language, you already use, but you will use it very differently. The difference isn’t made by me, but by you. I support your process of discrimination or differentiation. Once you can discern your EL, you would like to continue with it and this motivation emerges naturally from its contrast with your DL. Although you have had DL so often, you don’t want it anymore, as you have found something better. It is because of your LE, you want to continue your EL.